[Spoilers] Defining the phrase "€˜Hung Like a Horse"€™: Pb & the Kuriotates

[BCAgamer]

Obligatory PB is an idiot post

Seconded. Pb, you're an idiot

[fire&ice]

At this point, I’d like to throw the floor open

Furthermore, I’m a still a turn behind, and the next turn update is juicy.

You guys can either wait for tomorrow to get it (or maybe even the next day).
Or 15 separate people can create a post in this thread containing the sentence “Pb you’re an idiot” and I’ll post it straight away.

Up to you.

plz give in before we have a heart attack


only 2 more people

Edit: @Serdoa

who need selfcontrol

[Serdoa]

Why should I write "PB you are an idiot" when I won't see your message before tomorrow anyway?

[Twinkletoes89]

PB, you are an idiot but quite possibly also a genius!

[Ulsoro]

PB, you're an Idiot.

And if I weren't spoiled I'd jump in and offer my opinion in a heartbeat.

As it is, I'm afraid of saying or not saying anything that will or won't cause you to do or not do something.

Either way, your updates are great, so keep em up.

[The Reverend Doctor]

Hey! I'm a dedicated lurker! Don't I feel useful all of a sudden... (haha sorry you didn't get the opinions of someone smarter than I)

So after your chat with selrahc where he mentioned the hippus being scared of airships I thought I'd check out just what they do (I've certainly never used them in a game before). Let's open up world builder and play with them some...

*Note: Worldbuildering in things in FFH is a terrible chore. There's like 500 more units than in base civ and the list is alphabetical only sometimes. Airships are about 2/3 down on the very right column in my list if someone else is looking for them.

*goes to play with the cool flying boats, certainly intimidating if nothing else*

So I think the hippus are using this as an excuse, there's no way they're actually scared of these. With raiders you could just come down from above using his roads anyway, no need to sneak around the side.

This though:

(12:34:49 PM) pocketbeetle: Why on earth would I build skyships with raider units?
(12:34:51 PM) pocketbeetle: sec
(12:35:29 PM) pocketbeetle: well sure, but I'll still have to unload them, at which point just gank them

is a bit incorrect. Something cool (maybe you didn't notice or were playing down) is that unlike regular boats units retain their movement when unloaded from airships. So you could theoretically fly to a spot in the middle of a civ, them being powerless to fight your flying units, and drop your centaurs with raiders and attack in so many directions the very same turn.

Still, a lame excuse.

I guess if I were trying to think like the hippus I'd just be stalling and hoping you two would war sooner rather than later without me. Two things could happen that would both benefit me:

If you start to win I offer to help and take some juicy Calabim land, you can't do anything with it anyway.

If the vampires start to win, hopefully they'll have started their attack at your close jungle settlements and I can sneak up the coast while your forces are diverted and take the prizes of your real cities.

Wild Guess: He hopes he can be opportunistic and take some prize cities either way without committing early and running the risk of picking the wrong side.

[pocketbeetle]

Never have I seen a forum so slow to call someone an idiot, but I'm glad we've established that fact now.

Also, if you bring the giants to Bobs land in a possible war, will you troll him further by naming them Tiger and Wolf Rider again? :P

Love it!
That's a great idea!

Pb you're an idiot



couldn't resist,

That's just not fair.
At least include my comment that it was my first time playing Kennen ever!

No!


It can't be!


Cull has built... a Herbalist?

No, but in making his most recent decision he sure must have visited one and bought an ounce of the pungent stuff.

Hey! I'm a dedicated lurker! Don't I feel useful all of a sudden... (haha sorry you didn't get the opinions of someone smarter than I)

Hi Rev,

So after your chat with selrahc where he mentioned the hippus being scared of airships I thought I'd check out just what they do (I've certainly never used them in a game before). Let's open up world builder and play with them some...

*Note: Worldbuildering in things in FFH is a terrible chore. There's like 500 more units than in base civ and the list is alphabetical only sometimes. Airships are about 2/3 down on the very right column in my list if someone else is looking for them.

Yeah I know, I frequently grumble to myself about that also.

*goes to play with the cool flying boats, certainly intimidating if nothing else*

So I think the hippus are using this as an excuse, there's no way they're actually scared of these. With raiders you could just come down from above using his roads anyway, no need to sneak around the side.

Exactly.

This though:

is a bit incorrect. Something cool (maybe you didn't notice or were playing down) is that unlike regular boats units retain their movement when unloaded from airships. So you could theoretically fly to a spot in the middle of a civ, them being powerless to fight your flying units, and drop your centaurs with raiders and attack in so many directions the very same turn.

Okay, I haven't tried using them yet but I'll see if I can get around to it - I imagine that's a bug if so.

Still, a lame excuse.

I guess if I were trying to think like the hippus I'd just be stalling and hoping you two would war sooner rather than later without me. Two things could happen that would both benefit me:

If you start to win I offer to help and take some juicy Calabim land, you can't do anything with it anyway.

If the vampires start to win, hopefully they'll have started their attack at your close jungle settlements and I can sneak up the coast while your forces are diverted and take the prizes of your real cities.

Wild Guess: He hopes he can be opportunistic and take some prize cities either way without committing early and running the risk of picking the wrong side.

That sounds fair enough, but equally it's not good from my point of view.

It means I've got an unreliable opportunistic neighbour on my border who is effectively waiting for a minor slip up by me in order to pounce.
That only if I'm winning (and therefore probably don't need his help) will he join in and help me.

Not good!

[pocketbeetle]

Turn 162:

This turn starts with a bombshell before I’ve even opened the save:

Cull's "NAP extension" with Bob has a rather more sinister tone than you thought. The dwarves have vassalized to the vampires.The elves can't be far behind. I'm guessing Cull didn't consult you about this either?

W ………………. T ……………… FFFFFF!

You’ve got to be shitting me.

Turn log confirms.



And with that ladies and gents, playtime is officially over.
Operation ATM is now being enacted, cash withdrawals will be made, a cookie to whoever figures out what it is. No hints will be given.

Research is switched to Engineering: it’s the closest at-hand military tech. Elementalism and Hemah can wait until after.
Production in every city is switched to CAs, the PoC can wait a couple of turns, overflow from building CAs in Caledor will knock a turn off the wonder’s buildtime anyway (3->2).

Civic switch -> Military State and Conquest.



Words cannot express how painful it is for me to leave Agrarianism, but I need that +2xp to produce 6 xp units, and switching from Apprenticeship to Military State goes from -10% to +15% military unit production, ie a 25% hammer bonus shift, equivalent to a free forge.

Speaking of 6 xp units, Kes is flown to KK and splits the GC.
Command Post created.



That damn lizardman ruins has still not spawned anything, so screw it, abandon that plan.
Vanilla Ice is a mobile scouting base now, that’s it.
I’ll keep him there for the moment, even though I’m running the risk of him being trapped between the Khazad and Calabim.
Need the information (athough it’s worth noting that any moral qualms about sending hawks into Khazad cities have now officially evaporated).

If you were interested, the change to Military State also lowered costs as well as culture, so the GNP is now more representative of the actual beaker/gold output.



Checking the trade screen, as suspected, Cull is now providing all the happiness resources Bob didn’t possess, and is receiving spare cast offs in return.
The Copper is interesting and worth a note.

Around Riedquat, Sareln’s hunter failed to take the subtle hint from Curly, so I’m bringing in non animal/beast class support in the form of Jumbo, who is a mounted unit.



Jumbo was SoF’d by the Stonewarden out of Avelorn and is clumping his way South, whereupon I’ll move both HN units out and send in the WE first.
70% odds suck, but I consider it worth taking to get rid of that damn hawk base, so long as I have another HN unit to help clear up.

Interesting point: I threw up a WB test, and I think Sareln wouldn’t have odds on Curly if he were to step out this turn.
It would be str 6 (5 + 20%) vs str 6.36 (7 + 40% (Combat II) – 50% (hunter bonus)) which gives 34% odds.
But now that the Svartalfar hunter is 25% fortified, my odds on attack are even worse with the Hill Giant.

At Zaonce, I decided I needed some xp, right now.



With Combat II, Amycus had 71% odds, which as above, are a bit meh.
With C2 and Cover however, things become a lot rosier.

The other two raider CAs in Zaonce then followed suit, promoting C1 Cover to get ~85% odds.
All three of them survived, for which I thank the RNG Gods and promise to only whimper quietly when I next get a 98% odds loss.
Surprisingly Amycus took the most damage.



Casting Sprint then allowed all of them to retreat back to Zaonce on the same turn, which will mean they heal faster.
I’ve also got the Avelorn Stonewarden heading down to speed up the process.

Ending turn completed two CAs and another four will be built next turn.



In no particular order:

• All growth has been halted, most cities are now crop neutral, Caledor is starving at -1 fpt.
  
• Avelorn is running 5 out of a possible 6 specialists to pop the next GP in 10t, which will obviously lengthen when the current GA ends.
  
• In better foreign news, Selrahc has slaved out a monument in his Dyes city, current culture ratio on the Dyes tile is 98% Svart 1% Illian.
  
• Ignore the earlier screenshots showing 100% research, I dialed it down at the end once I realised I can get the same research time (4t) while still going 50% this turn.
  Will return to Elementalism etc once Engineering is in.
  
• Tablets of Bambur completed as per turnlog.
  +10 gpt magnified to +15 gpt by God-King bonus.
  Earth I will be given to some Adepts at some point for Wall of Stone.
  
• Minor concern/interesting point: Draft button was greyed out and unavailable to me, despite being in Military State (allows 4 units to be drafted per turn)?
  

Demographics:

Included the demos to show how solidly everyone is being beaten by the Calabim Crop Yield figures.
I’m in second place with 2/3 of their number.

[pocketbeetle]

Diplo:

My eloquent reply to Selrahc.

Fuck no.
If anything Cull misled me and probably lied.
I’ve included the email chain below for you to read (bottom up); note the last comment he makes.


I know my emails are starting to get repetitive with their alarmist tones, but have you considered the possibility that Cull is now simply playing for revenge, and Bob is the only one capable/willing to offer that?

Interesting fact of the day: up until now, Cull has been unable to build Axemen despite having the necessary tech (BW) due to a lack of Copper.
That changed this turn: Bob is now supplying Cull with Copper.


More worringly, I’m now getting concerned about Iskender also.
Around a week ago I approached him regarding a military alliance vs the Calabim (it’s the reason why I went Raiders – I wanted to delay Vampires. Clearly that plan has failed).
At first his response was positive, with Iskender saying he was “very interested”.
However since then, he’s done nothing but delay and come up with reasons not to get involved. It ended with our last chat where he told me he still hasn’t made up his mind (delaying) but he’s thinking about staying neutral (excuse).
And then it turns out he’s sending you emails warning about me?!?


I really think you and I need to start getting our act together.
We're at a serious risk of being eliminated by something as unclassy as a bog standard Vampire rush.
Would you be interested in a Mutual Defense Pact for a set period of time, say 50 turns?

And yes, I fully realise that if Bob is serious about negotiating trades with you, it makes me the more likely target.
But we’re both smart enough to know, that whichever one of the two of us gets removed, the other is almost certainly next in line – particularly if Iskender and Bob are in actuality working together (and build up a bond of trust).

Trust me, Bob’s not going to just sit on those Vampires until T200+.
The demographics (approval rate) and graphs (crop yield) tell a clear story: he’s growing his cities into unhappiness right now, in preparation for feeding and xp gain.



Lastly, can I include a standard confidentiality request etc here.
If the opportunity presents itself and you feel like discreetly sounding out a potential relationship between Bob and Iskender, then please by all means.
But for now, I’d really appreciate you not mentioning anything relating to my concerns over Iskender.
I’d like to at least give him a while longer to make a decision, it is possible that he’s just having second thoughts.


Regards as always,
Pb, Insert something silly here Boy-King

The last comment in Cull’s email being:

Thanks for the headsup about Bob, even though you probably already knew of Selarhc.

I’m worried that I might have overplayed my hand here, and that this email could have the opposite effect.
However, Selrahc has got to be feeling a little uncomfortable with two of Bob’s vassals and Bob himself on the Illian doorstep.
If ever the Illians are going to join in this kind of proposal, it’s now.

In the end analysis, if everyone is out to get me, then I’m already dead.
I have to trust someone, and Selrahc at this time seems like the best bet.


And yes, to say I’m pissed at Cull would be an understatement.
I think his decision is a spineless one.

When I saw it confirmed ingame I was tempted to send him an email pointing that vassalising to the Calabim pretty much guaranteed that at some point he’d be going to war with the one civ that went out of their way to save his ass.
But then I realised, what’s the point?

He’s made his bed, clearly he’s satisfied with, at best, being second place loser (after Bob and Sareln also? How do we decide podium places with multiple vassals, is it done by chronological order? If I vassalise to Bob now, do I get a guaranteed fourth place? How tempting!) and nothing I say to Cull can change that.
Vassals are permanent aren’t they? Or like the AIs will he get the option to break free if he exceeds certain score/land percentages?

As far as I’m concerned Cull now exists to provide me with Gold, if he fails to do that, then he’s xp fodder.



<<Editor’s note: And thus Pb’s plan of keeping all the civs in the game “in play” falls from the sky like a flaming meteor.
See it crash and burn!
Everyone go: “Oooh! Ahhhh! What a pretty sight!”>>


And another thing regarding Iskender: (I’m starting to find so many holes now… why has he failed to follow up and ask for Cow/Sheep at all?
When offered free resources for nothing, people don’t normally say no.

[Cyneheard]

Curiosity about Military State: What units are draftable in FFH that you can build? That could be the issue.