[Spoilers] What, no fireballs?! Team FFH: we're not in Erebus anymore

[Ichabod]

So, it seems the dream is coming to an end. Well, this was certainly a rollercoaster ride. I'll save most of my thoughts to the postgame thread, but I'll let everyone know what the hell I was doing with the game.

Since my economy was so bad, my only shot at winning was to keep conquering land. So I was going to reinforce my troops a bit and do the following:

I was going to plant a city in the red X and Culture Bomb it to try and win some more tiles. Getting Pindicator's culture away would be easy, since he had recently conquered that land from Moogle (although he also culture bombed the region).

The Great Artist would be made during my GA, that would be fired by this guy:

He was sitting there waiting for the Angkor Wat to be ready (I had a chop ready to speed things up), after what I'd start the GA.

I'd try to get a Great prophet for my shrine (like 15 gold) by running Angkor Wat priests. With pacifism + GA + AW + Moai Statues, I think I'd have the GP in 5 turns in Acedia. After that, I'd try to farm a GSci and a GArt from my cities, by running completely starvation mode with Caste System.

The other objective of the GA was to fund my way to Guilds.

In the end, here's how the demos looked:

Not THAT bad, but that's 100% research, which costed me an arm to pay for.

I'll post some more pictures of the empire later. Anything in particular you want to see? If so, just tell me, before the game fades into oblivion...

[Brian Shanahan]

why would you not download patches? You don't even have to find a super secret website like you did for older games, you can just click the "update" button in-game.

Pure ignorance. Will update tonight. Thanks!

Update button doesn't always work. Easiest thing to do is to just download from CFC.

[Ichabod]

[SIZE="4"]Desolation Row...[/SIZE]


They’re selling postcards of the hanging
They’re painting the passports brown
The beauty parlor is filled with sailors
The circus is in town
Here comes the blind commissioner
They’ve got him in a trance
One hand is tied to the tight-rope walker
The other is in his pants
And the riot squad they’re restless
They need somewhere to go
As Lady and I look out tonight
From Desolation Row

Final screenshot from my army, for intends of prize winning. :neenernee

Cinderella, she seems so easy
“It takes one to know one,” she smiles
And puts her hands in her back pockets
Bette Davis style
And in comes Romeo, he’s moaning
“You Belong to Me I Believe”
And someone says, “You’re in the wrong place my friend
You better leave”
And the only sound that’s left
After the ambulances go
Is Cinderella sweeping up
On Desolation Row

My map pictures for the big Pangea map:

Now the moon is almost hidden
The stars are beginning to hide
The fortune-telling lady
Has even taken all her things inside
All except for Cain and Abel
And the hunchback of Notre Dame
Everybody is making love
Or else expecting rain
And the Good Samaritan, he’s dressing
He’s getting ready for the show
He’s going to the carnival tonight
On Desolation Row

Demographics:

Now Ophelia, she’s ’neath the window
For her I feel so afraid
On her twenty-second birthday
She already is an old maid
To her, death is quite romantic
She wears an iron vest
Her profession’s her religion
Her sin is her lifelessness
And though her eyes are fixed upon
Noah’s great rainbow
She spends her time peeking
Into Desolation Row

Units/Buildings Built/Killed:

Einstein, disguised as Robin Hood
With his memories in a trunk
Passed this way an hour ago
With his friend, a jealous monk
He looked so immaculately frightful
As he bummed a cigarette
Then he went off sniffing drainpipes
And reciting the alphabet
Now you would not think to look at him
But he was famous long ago
For playing the electric violin
On Desolation Row

Financial Advisor:

Dr. Filth, he keeps his world
Inside of a leather cup
But all his sexless patients
They’re trying to blow it up
Now his nurse, some local loser
She’s in charge of the cyanide hole
And she also keeps the cards that read
“Have Mercy on His Soul”
They all play on pennywhistles
You can hear them blow
If you lean your head out far enough
From Desolation Row

City Screen:

Across the street they’ve nailed the curtains
They’re getting ready for the feast
The Phantom of the Opera
A perfect image of a priest
They’re spoonfeeding Casanova
To get him to feel more assured
Then they’ll kill him with self-confidence
After poisoning him with words
And the Phantom’s shouting to skinny girls
“Get Outa Here If You Don’t Know
Casanova is just being punished for going
To Desolation Row”

Now at midnight all the agents
And the superhuman crew
Come out and round up everyone
That knows more than they do
Then they bring them to the factory
Where the heart-attack machine
Is strapped across their shoulders
And then the kerosene
Is brought down from the castles
By insurance men who go
Check to see that nobody is escaping
To Desolation Row

Praise be to Nero’s Neptune
The Titanic sails at dawn
And everybody’s shouting
“Which Side Are You On?”
And Ezra Pound and T. S. Eliot
Fighting in the captain’s tower
While calypso singers laugh at them
And fishermen hold flowers
Between the windows of the sea
Where lovely mermaids flow
And nobody has to think too much
About Desolation Row

Yes, I received your letter yesterday
(About the time the doorknob broke)
When you asked how I was doing
Was that some kind of joke?
All these people that you mention
Yes, I know them, they’re quite lame
I had to rearrange their faces
And give them all another name
Right now I can’t read too good
Don’t send me no more letters, no
Not unless you mail them
From Desolation Row

Lyrics by Bob Dylan

[Gaspar]

+5 million points for doing an end of game post set to Bob Dylan.

[DaveV]

Just to clarify all the team talk, my crack statisticians compiled a nifty pie chart showing how much effort each member of the FFH trio put into the game:

[pindicator]

[SIZE="5"]WARNING! The following post can only be read by people with SUPERIOR INTELLIGENCE![/SIZE]

[SIZE="4"]An Ontopsychological analysys of the Diplo Thread from PB 7: A case study, part I[/SIZE]


For the weak minded, it may seem that the Diplo Thread from PB7 is just a thread for friendly banter between players of a casual (pun intended) computer game. [SIZE="3"]BUT IT'S NOT!![/SIZE] The Diplo Thread (shortened to DT from now on) is actually the place of intense battles of the mind, where the actual GAME is being played. "The Pitboss is a farce"¹, it has been said. This is also true for the PB7 game played in the online community of Realms Beyond². While the eletronic game exists (it has something to do with cities and units or something like that, irrelevamt), the actual GAME is not about that game, but about another game (GAME).

This means that the game being played in the pixelated world is not the conflict in itself. It is only the "creator of conflict³". The real conflict is between the minds of the players, in which they struggle to find out who has the [SIZE="4"]SUPERIOR INTELLIGENCE[/SIZE]. In the end, only one sane mind will prevail (crowned the WINNER¹¹), leaving the others competitors in a scenario of totally smashed pride, dubious manhood and possibly being scratched off the superior mind's boot. A miserable condition which translates itself into the loss of humanity and personality.

The objective of the game, inherently conditionated by it, is to overcome the alien minds with a combination of arrogance, smugness, presumption, disrespect, condescension, lies and whatever else is needed to blow the brains of the adversary, making him enter a state of unwillingness to even exist in the form of being in the GAME (a concept commonly described as "this game is not fun anymore") and concede to the [SIZE="4"]MASSIVE MIND CAPACITY[/SIZE] of the player.

That being said, we will now take a look at the case of Mackoti/SevenSpirits vs. Commodore/Xenu.




¹PLATONICUS. Truth, Reason, Art and Pitboss: A study of the human mind. Some translations from the original greek work translate this sentence as "There is no Pitboss". This translation, though, is wrong, since it implies that the Pitboss doesn't exist in the realm of the being. What the author meant was that, while the Pitboss is, it is NOT about the Pitboss.

²www (dot) realmsbeyond (dot) net - WATCH OUT FOR THE GOOGLE HACK!!

³MALCHICHAVEL. Civilizatum Quatrum: Beyondus Swordum.

¹¹"Whiner" is also a possible translation.

I'm only halfway through your thread but this post was pure gold! I was laughing out loud in a quiet coffee shop while reading it, making a scene

I think you could swap out CFC Demogame with Pitboss 7 and still be able to use this post for that game too

[Ichabod]

I'm only halfway through your thread but this post was pure gold! I was laughing out loud in a quiet coffee shop while reading it, making a scene

I think you could swap out CFC Demogame with Pitboss 7 and still be able to use this post for that game too

Glad you liked it and I hope you can have fun with the rest of the thread. Let's hope our demogame will be more in the spirit of lighthearted fun.