What would you do?

[Griselda]

Hey gang,

I have a judgement call to make here, and I could use some input. I've probably made up my mind already, but it would be nice to hear others' points of view.

Last week, while my husband and daughter were waiting for me in our car, somebody pulled in next to us and scratched the bumper. It's not a big scratch, but it's all the way through the paint and maybe 4" long. It's small enough that I wonder if the person who did it might have just driven away, except for the fact that my husband was in the car and saw it happen.

We got her name and phone number, but not her insurance number. It doesn't seem like calling the insurance company would do either of us any good.

I didn't think that it would cost very much to repair. Maybe a little sanding and some touch up paint, and we'd be all set. But, all the repair places want at least $350 to fix the scratch. They say that it's too deep, and with metallic paint you can't touch it up anyway; you have to repaint the entire bumper.

The bumper is plastic. If we don't fix it, it won't rust. On the other hand, the car is new. We have another 6 years of car payments to make on it.

So, I'm not sure what to do here. If the repair was less costly, I'd have no problem asking the woman to pay for the repair. But, $350 seems like an awful lot to charge for a little scratch. There's even a chance that we could fix it and have it scratched again the next day by somebody else, who wouldn't stick around to pay for the repair. We have a similar scratch on the front bumper already, for example, but we don't know who did it and don't have an extra $350 to repair that one ourselves. On the other hand, if I had put a scratch in somebody else's car, I would want to make sure that I had paid for the repair.

If this was our old car, I wouldn't think twice about leaving the scratch on there. Of course, looking at our old car, I'm guessing that similar contact would never have scratched the car.

I think we're going to tell her not to worry about the damages. It's just too expensive of a repair. Part of me hopes that she will insist on paying, although that's probably unlikely. So, I'm just wondering if I will kick myself for this down the road, if scratch by scratch our nice new car starts looking like a piece of junk.

-Griselda

[Smegged]

Gris,

sounds to me like you have already made up your mind, but here's my two cents (since you asked for it). If it were me I wouldn't ask her to pay.The damage is merely superficial and won't harm your car long term. I know how disappointing it can be though when you get something new and it gets "ruined" or damaged by someone else, however I'm a firm believer in "what goes around comes around" or "karma" or "do unto others as you would have them do unto you". Aesthetics aside, all that getting the bumper repaired does is set it up to get scratched in some other way. Accidents happen and $350 is a lot of money to repair a tiny little scratch.

Then there is the other side of the coin that says that it was the other persons carelessness and why should you be punished for their error. I mean after all, it wasn't your fault that she ran into your car. She probably needs to learn a lesson about driving anyway, and $350 might give her the wakeup call she needs...

-Smegged

[Sirian]

$350 is a lot of money to repair a scratch. However, I am not surprised.

If you are uncomfortable asking her to pay that much, you are not stuck with all or nothing. You could tell her what it will cost you then offer to settle for less. Exactly how much would be up to the parties involved to negotiate, to where all consider the arrangement to be fair. Keep in mind the deductibles, too. You wouldn't get the full cost recovered in most cases anyway.


- Sirian

[Drasca]

I am liking and learning from Sirian's reply. Asking for partial payment, and being reasonable about it seems great.

The 350$ sounds like one of the "you must repair" ripoffs, being superficial damage after all.

[Nystul]

Personally, I wouldn't get it fixed. At the most, I might do a halfbaked touchup job to make it less obvious. They are called bumpers for a reason, and the painting of bumpers is one of the great crimes of our lifetime. For $350 you ought to be able to buy a new bumper and keep the old one as a spare.

Car appearance means everything to some people and nothing to others. So I think it's a pretty personal decision. If this is something that is going to bother you every time you look at it, then Sirian's suggestion might be a good idea.

[Sirian]

Asking for partial payment, and being reasonable about it seems great.

Put the ball in her court. "The repair shop quoted three hundred fifty dollars to restore the bumper to new condition. How much of that do you think it would be fair for you to pay?" Then listen to what she has to say. If she plays fair and offers something you consider reasonable, you can take it. If she's a bit under what you think is fair, you can haggle. If she insults you, you still have the option to fall back on playing hardball.

She may offer more than you would have asked for and be happy that you didn't ask her to pay it all. If not, you are still holding a hand full of cards.


- Sirian

[ShadowHM]

Put the ball in her court. "The repair shop quoted three hundred fifty dollars to restore the bumper to new condition. How much of that do you think it would be fair for you to pay?" Then listen to what she has to say. If she plays fair and offers something you consider reasonable, you can take it. If she's a bit under what you think is fair, you can haggle. If she insults you, you still have the option to fall back on playing hardball.

She may offer more than you would have asked for and be happy that you didn't ask her to pay it all. If not, you are still holding a hand full of cards.


- Sirian

Hi

I would go along with Sirian here. First, the cost quoted by the repair shop is, sadly, quite within the range I have seen recently. Second, the woman did indeed do the damage. Put the ball in her court and see what happens. It doesn't cost you anything at all to ask and you should not make assumptions about what is 'too much' for her budget.

I have had a couple of recent incidents in that vein.

First, the side of my car got scraped in a parking lot. It is the absolute worst parking lot I know, with the narrowest parking spots and the least amount of turn room to get in and out of them. (The store is worth it though. ) The man who did it was honourable enough to actually come in the store and find me to admit to his error and trade information. I sought out the best repair quote I could. I shared the quotes I had received with him, and (as Sirian is suggesting) I asked him what next steps he wanted to take. He offered to match the lowest quote. I settled with him for that amount, as I really did have to make the repair. Rust happens fast here.

Second, I knocked someone's rear-view side mirror out of the frame for it. He had parked his truck on a main throughfare, half up on the sidewalk and half up on the road. As I passed along the road, I failed to give enough space for our two rear-view side mirrors, and they clipped. Yes, he should not have parked there at all. However, yes, I did it. I gave the man my information and the business card of my own mechanic, telling him that I would arrange for payment for the replacement if my mechanic did it. It cost me, but this way I had some assurance that I would be paying a fair price for the repair.



So I recommend giving the woman a chance to discuss things with you, instead of unilaterally deciding on her behalf what is fair and appropriate in her circumstances.

[dathon]

I had the almost exact same situation happen to me in June; I bought a new car in April, and in June, somebody dinged the bumper. However, they were apparently not as honorable as this woman, as I have no idea who did it. Since I had just graduated my Master's degree the month before, my Dad offered to pay for the repairs as a graduation gift. I got two quotes, one was for $450, the other for $250. I obviously chose the latter. So, two things I learned from this that apply to your situation:

*The quote for repairs is not unreasonable.
*Do NOT try to touch up a plastic bumper with metallic paint!!! I tried some of the touch-up paint that was given to me by the car dealer. The bumper is painted the same metallic silver as the metal parts of the car. It looked HORRID. Leaving the scratch would have honestly probably looked better. The paint does a poor job of "filling in" the crack, especially if it is as deep as you say (like mine was). Even after a dozen coats, it just did not look right. So I would suggest you either have it professionally fixed, or forget about it.

-dathon

[Jaffa]

Cars get scratched. IMO it's not worth repairing cosmetic damage unless you intend to put in the time and money to keep the car in showroom condition.

Get the woman to pay for a bumper sticker of your choice to put over the scratch.

[Griselda]

Well, in case anybody is still interested, I thought I'd let you know how it went. Thanks, by the way, for all the feedback. Just by typing the post I realized that at least part of my problem was my own concern that I wouldn't be able to take care of the car and keep it in good shape. Even though it's just a little compact car, it's the most expensive thing I've ever owned, and I don't want to trash it.

I realized that the woman who hit the car is not responsible for my own insecurity about my possessions, though. That would be silly. But, I think it's also good advice not to assume that she's unable to pay for the damage.

My huband ended up calling her. It seems to work out that he handles verbal communications, and I handle the written ones. I think that lets each of us use our strengths. I talked to him about the suggestions in this thread, and suggested that he try to word it in such a way to allow her the option of paying for at least some of the damage.

It turns out that she was not interested in paying for a portion of the damage. It seems like she would have paid if we had demanded it, but once we softened, even a bit, she wanted no part in paying for this. So, the scratch in the bumper will stay. If I'm worried about the car, I can vacuum the thing and make sure the oil gets changed regularly. Both of those things will probably go a lot further than a scratch on the bumper anyway.

I did get my first rock chip in the windshield this week, though. :mad: Maybe I'm just doomed.