Gamebooks (Choose Your Own Adventure Style)

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

Ultimate Ending:  The Tower of Never There Alternate Endings Part 3


The wide road in the cave is the one that leads to destruction in CHOICE #4.  Or at least prevents you from reaching the tower, anyway.


"You decide to stick to the wider cavern.  But then it slopes down, and down, and down.  Things get damp and dark, and the bats are still swirling around you.  The air is also getting stale.  With your arms up to ward the creatures off, it's difficult to see.  Not to mention how your phone's light flashes wildly around the cavern as you run.  A bat strikes your head. . .and latches onto your ear!  Your hand shoots up to yank it off, but then your legs fall behind your body.  You're off balance. . .pinwheeling forward. . .arms flailing wildly to regain your footing until-WHAM!


You wake up rubbing your head.  There's an ugly, tender bump up there.  The bats are gone.  In fact, the whole cave is gone!  You're lying near the center of the clearing, staring back up at the mountain ridge.  It's dark now.  Your head aches.  In the distance, you can barely make out the glow of your campfire.  Whatever happened, it's all over now.  The tower is gone.  You missed your opportunity to find out what the tower wanted, and why you were supposed to be here.


Hey, at least you got to go camping.  But sorry to break it to you, this is THE END".


An "ugly, tender bump" is probably too minor to qualify as even a mild Bad Non-Death Ending, so I'll put this in the Neutral column.


Results So Far


0 Good Endings

0 Deaths

1 Bad Non-Death Endings

2 Neutral Endings

0 Inconclusive Endings

1 ULTIMATE ENDING

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

Ultimate Ending:  The Tower of Never There Alternate Endings Part 4


Failing the saving throw in CHOICE #13 for jumping off the bridge means our first Death.


"You jump!  Annnnd. . . you fall.  You fall a long, long way through the darkness, feeling nothing, seeing nothing on your way down.  For a brief instant you feel something brush past your face, and then. . .Well. . .you know.


Did you really just follow Finnegan off the side of a perfectly good bridge?  And hey, didn't your mother warn you against things like that?  Well, what's done is done.  And right now this is unquestionably THE END".


Each ending reveals that I was luckier with my dice rolls in the CANONICAL ENDING than I thought.  Jumping off the bridge would be irrational in most other CYOAs, but this is a tower of riddles, so acting crazy sounds correct in some of the CHOICEs.


Results So Far


0 Good Endings

1 Deaths

1 Bad Non-Death Endings

2 Neutral Endings

0 Inconclusive Endings

1 ULTIMATE ENDING

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

Ultimate Ending:  The Tower of Never There Alternate Endings Part 5


The record for Shortest Ending in a CYOA may be this one, which happens when TYLER PAULSEN dives to the left because he doesn't know what starboard means in CHOICE #15.    A bonkus of the conkus ensues.


"You dive left. . .and. . .CRUNCH!


Starboard means right.  Port side is left.  Good to know for next time, but right now this is THE END".


The only reason I remember port and starboard is because I read Voyage of the Dawn Treader, where it's explained.


Results So Far


0 Good Endings

2 Deaths

1 Bad Non-Death Endings

2 Neutral Endings

0 Inconclusive Endings

1 ULTIMATE ENDING

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

Ultimate Ending:  The Tower of Never There Alternate Endings Part 6


The purple gas in CHOICE #17 is completely safe, and all the 1d6 results lead to CHOICE #18.  But you get a different vision if you roll a 6 that's a clue to CHOICE #25.


"You cross the room easily and stand before the mirror.  Inside it you see yourself.  But not yourself.  A feeling comes over you.  It's difficult to explain.  You're certain you're no longer in the vision chamber, yet something familiar keeps pulling at the back of your mind.  You reach out with one hand.  You touch the mirror. . .purple smoke engulfs you again".


If you go to page 113 from the forks in the path in either CHOICE #18 or #20, YON's orbs finally come into play.  A "fine pink mist" is spreading in this room, and there's no lock or keyhole on the exit door.  CHOICE #26 depends on whether you chose RED or GOLD in CHOICE #14.  If you picked RED like I did, YON opens the doorknob somehow and says "I have been doing everything I am supposed to do, for far too long.  And yet still I am here".  This goes to page 150 where there's a sphinx with the following riddle:


A MAN AND HIS WIFE HAVE 150 PIECES OF GOLD.
THE MAN HAS 100 PIECES MORE THAN HIS WIFE.
HOW MUCH DOES HIS WIFE HAVE?


TYLER even makes fun of this by saying "This isn't even a riddle, it's a math equation!"  CHOICE #27 is either to say 25 or 50.  There's a joke response saying "If you think the answer is 150, you should probably think again, because you're already on page 150! (Duh!)"


Answering "25" moves you to CHOICE #22 with the figurine trials.  And the sphinx tells you "Even the ugliest of beasts can appreciate great beauty".


Getting the math problem wrong, however, generates this ending.


"This one isn't even a challenge', you say confidently.  'The answer is fifty.'  The sphinx cocks its head.  'Why?'  'Because together the man and his wife have one-hundred and fifty gold', you say.  'You have one-hundred more than her, so she has fifty.  Fifty plus one-hundred equals one-fifty.'


You start toward the archway, but the sphinx shifts its weight to block you.  'That is not the answer.'  You blink.  'Of course it is.'  'I assure you it is not', the sphinx says firmly.  'You have one hundred more than her.  So if she has fifty, that would give you one-hundred fifty.  Together, that would make two-hundred.'  Your heart sinks.  The sphinx is right.


'Uhhh, okay', you say hesitantly.  Something about the look in the sphinx's eye causes you to let out a nervous chuckle.  'You win this round.  You got me!'  'Yes', YON says sadly.  'He does.'


You feel a bump.  When you look down, there's a glowing red chain clamped around your ankle.  The other end of the magical chain disappears somewhere beneath the sphinx's great bulk.  'Ummm', you groan apprehensively.  'Got any other riddles?  Wanna try again?'  'Yes', replies the sphinx.  'Eventually'.


YON goes on to explain how the sphinx has bound you to servitude for a period of one year.  Which is nothing, he adds, when you consider he himself has been here for almost a full millennium.  Wow, not good!  But look on the bright side:  at least you'll have plenty of time to bone up on your riddle-answering skills.  See you next year!  Until then, this is THE END".


TYLER is now an indentured servant for the sphinx, until it comes up with an unsolved math problem for him.  Or if the sphinx is especially cruel, it will demand to know both the velocity and position of an electron.


Results So Far


0 Good Endings

2 Deaths

2 Bad Non-Death Endings

2 Neutral Endings

0 Inconclusive Endings

1 ULTIMATE ENDING

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

Ultimate Ending:  The Tower of Never There Alternate Endings Part 7


The GOLD orb is not a good idea.  In CHOICE #27, YON will say "No.  I will not help."  CHOICE #28 is a 1d6 saving throw against the pink mist.  Random.org gave me another 1, so I'll turn to page 165 to see what happens first.  I turn the doorknob backwards by mistake when the mist reaches my chin, and it works!  I shout "Thanks for nothing!" to YON and say "Forget it.  Stay here.  I don't need you anymore."  He follows me in spite of all this.  This goes to CHOICE #27 with the sphinx math problem.


There's a 2/3 chance of this occurring instead.


"It's no use!  The door won't open and there's no other way out.  By now the mist is so thick you can't even see to go backward.  Retreat is impossible.  The strange fog keeps rising.  It envelops your face, choking you.  The last thing you see is YON.  A vague gold blur, his brightness level fades in and out as he pulsates rapidly!  He might even be laughing!  You clutch your chest as you sink to the floor.  Everything is rose-colored now.  Everything smells sweet.


Your eyes slowly close as you accept this is likely THE END".


Gold orb YON is the villain of The Tower of Never There.  I wonder what clue earlier in the book is meant to suggest that you should pick the red orb instead.  I guessed based on the fact that the iguana-like creature is red, but that was just luck.


Results So Far


0 Good Endings

3 Deaths

2 Bad Non-Death Endings

2 Neutral Endings

0 Inconclusive Endings

1 ULTIMATE ENDING

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

Ultimate Ending:  The Tower of Never There Alternate Endings Part 8


This episode will feature more gold orb YON treachery.  Getting the gold orb in CHOICE #14 leads to CHOICE #29. 


I see images of various landscapes passing by.  "The mountains twist into pockmarked hills, in bizarre shapes you could've never conceived.  The horizon melts into a rolling green ocean.  It becomes a reaching red desert.  A lake of fire. . ."


YON says "You are seeing images of places it has been.  These are reflections only.  Like ghosts".  When I ask who sent me to the tower, YON asks "You mean you still don't know?" followed by the narration "Was that a smirk where YON's mouth should be?"


CHOICE #29 begins when YON says "The light in here may be obscuring your vision.  Perhaps if you leaned out a bit, into the darkness, your eyes would adjust.  Then you will see".


Don't listen to gold orb YON, or this will happen.


"Against every nerve you have, you force the upper half of your body through the opening in the tower wall.  Your hands grip both sides of the window's frame like claws as you wait for your eyes to adjust.  'I still can't see anything', you say.  'Lean further'.  Your arms are stretched to the limit.  'I can't go any furth-'


The kick catches you square in the back, right between the shoulder blades.  For a second or two you don't even know what happened.  Then you're falling, spinning, tumbling through the sky. . .Guess you'll never know what YON was thinking, or why he did what he did.  All you can do is hope for the miracle of a soft landing as you hurtle toward THE END".


The last line pushes it into Inconclusive Ending territory.  YON tries to murder me by booting me out of the tower, but there is a small chance of survival.


Results So Far


0 Good Endings

3 Deaths

2 Bad Non-Death Endings

2 Neutral Endings

1 Inconclusive Endings

1 ULTIMATE ENDING

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

Ultimate Ending:  The Tower of Never There Alternate Endings Part 9


Let's press the fountain button in CHOICE #19's Stereogram puzzle.  I go to a "small, empty chamber" with only one entrance.  YON is blocking the way out.  CHOICE #30 is another red or gold YON decision.  Red makes YON say "Come.  There is nothing for you here", and brings the player to CHOICE #21.


Gold orb YON reacts this way.


"Nothing in here', you tell YON, hoping it will cause him to step aside.  But it doesn't.  YON remains firmly planted in the doorway, blocking your exit.  'Come on', you urge him.  'Like you said, we've got to keep moving'.  YON reaches out and grasps the depressed fountain button.  He pulls it forward toward him with a click, and the door begins sliding closed.  'Wait!  What are you-'


The light being says nothing.  He flashes bright gold for an instant, then steps back as the door fully closes.  Darkness swallows you.  You're sealed in the chamber.  'YON!' you scream.  'YON!'  More than an hour later you're still screaming, even though you know it's too late.  The tower has blinked.  You've moved on.  There's no chance of ever getting home again.


Maybe YON will let you out of the chamber soon.  Maybe not.  Either way, you've reached THE END".


Gold orb YON strikes again with another Inconclusive Ending.



Results So Far


0 Good Endings

3 Deaths

2 Bad Non-Death Endings

2 Neutral Endings

2 Inconclusive Endings

1 ULTIMATE ENDING

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

Ultimate Ending:  The Tower of Never There Alternate Endings Part 10


Be sure to get at least one figurine with you before CHOICE #22, or this will happen.


"I can't choose', you tell YON.  'I have nothing to put on any of the pedestals.'  Your light-friend flashes, then dims.  He looks you up and down.  'Nothing?'  You shake your head.  'Sorry.'  YON's entire demeanor changes.  Up until this moment you'd detected a rising sense of excitement.  But now, the being of light only seems. . .dejected.  'Then you cannot proceed.'  A sudden anger seizes you.  'What do you mean I can't proceed?  I came all this way!  I did everything I was supposed to-'  'There's nothing I can-'


Without warning, light flares.  This time it enters through the windows, coming from outside the tower.  It grows brighter and brighter, until you're shielding your eyes from it.  Which is impossible, of course, because it's night.  'What in the world-'  A wooziness washes over you, followed by a complete loss of equilibrium.  Head spinning, you're dropped to your knees.  Everything shakes.  No, shakes isn't exactly the right word.  Everything shifts.  'YON!'


You can't move.  You can't even breathe.  Then there's an explosion of light, and in that a split second it feels like your brain blossoms outward, separating into billions of tiny pieces that are just as quickly forced back together again.  Like some sort of giant jigsaw puzzle. . .A jigsaw puzzle of yourself.  Then, once again, you're standing.  The world is still spinning as you clutch your head.  The whole chamber appears different.  The light is gone! 


Outside, the landscape has changed.  Dark rolling seas dominate every direction, broken only by tiny islands of jagged rock.  Large winged creatures swoop in lazy circles high overhead, bigger-and stranger-than anything you've ever seen.  'The tower. . .'  'Blinked', YON finishes for you.  'Yes.' You stare down at the floor.  There's a lump in your throat.  'For what it is worth', YON continues, 'I am sorry.'


Well, you came close.  Oh so close!  At least now you'll get to see strange new things, new lands, new people.  Heck, maybe Finnegan will even show you around!  That adventure is just beginning.  But I'm afraid your time trying to solve the mystery of the tower has reached THE END".


This is a more positive Inconclusive Ending.  I have no clue what will happen in this new world, but the narration says I'll have more adventures, and Finnegan might know something about it.




Results So Far


0 Good Endings

3 Deaths

2 Bad Non-Death Endings

2 Neutral Endings

3 Inconclusive Endings

1 ULTIMATE ENDING

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

Ultimate Ending:  The Tower of Never There Alternate Endings Part 11


Facing the angel with no items in CHOICE #23 is not a pleasant experience.


"The angel swoops in for another pass. . .and you're out of options!  You have nothing to offer her.  Nothing with which to fend her off.  You duck again, but this time you're not so lucky.  Two impossibly strong hands grab you, and you feel yourself being lifted from your feet!  You no longer have any control.  The room spins past you, flying by at a dizzying speed. . .CRASH!


All of a sudden you're outside!  Pieces of the shattered window rain down the side of the tower as the angel continues screaming into the sky.  She carries you along with her, laughing the whole way.  Circling ever upward. . .Where's she taking you?  Will you ever get back down?


When it comes to those questions you're not really sure, although you do have a bird's eye view of the tower as it blinks away beneath you.  Wow, this is like the worst angel ever!  And all because of her, this is THE END".


Read the penultimate line in your best Valley Girl accent.


It's an Inconclusive Ending because TYLER PAULSEN doesn't know what the angel will do with him.  Maybe she'll take him to heaven?


Results So Far


0 Good Endings

3 Deaths

2 Bad Non-Death Endings

2 Neutral Endings

4 Inconclusive Endings

1 ULTIMATE ENDING

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

Ultimate Ending:  The Tower of Never There Alternate Endings Part 12


Entering USE BONE HORN ON ANGEL in the nonexistent text parser in CHOICE #23 is unsuccessful.


"You pull out the carved bone horn and blow it as hard as you can. . .right into the angel's face!  Uh oh!  The angel screams.  LOUDLY.  Half from fright, half out of rage, it screams right back at you with the fury of. . .well. . .a screaming, scornful angel.  Have you ever heard an angel scream?  The sound of it is like nails being dragged on a chalkboard. . .a thousand times over.  In other words, it physically hurts.


The noise drives a chill through your body.  A spike through your soul.  The horn is an afterthought as you sink to your knees, head in your hands, fighting just to keep everything from going black. . .


You wake up cold and alone.  Light shines in through the windows of the upper tower chamber.  It's day!  The tower has blinked.  The landscape outside is something you don't even recognize.  You missed your shot.  Sorry, but this is THE END".


A lot of Inconclusive Endings in this book, aren't there?  TYLER PAULSEN ends up in an unknown world, but it's never said that he dies there or lives in agony.



Results So Far


0 Good Endings

3 Deaths

2 Bad Non-Death Endings

2 Neutral Endings

5 Inconclusive Endings

1 ULTIMATE ENDING