Here's the text whilst I sort out a host for my reports...
Epic 8 â Potluck
I wonder who Iâll get? I hope itâs Toku or Jules then I can be done by lunchtime. Anyone but Hatty would be fine though. Aha! An email from Gris with the save for Hatshepsut. Oh wellâ¦
Wikipedia tells us this about the first female Pharoah: âHatshepsut was a builder pharaoh. As pharaoh she initiated building projects that were grander and more numerous than those of any of her Middle Kingdom predecessorsâ. Not this incarnation: at Epic speed on a Pangea map, Domination is the way. This approach is reinforced when I examine the start. Itâs a low-food, high production site. I decide to move 1 tile west to bring the Goldmine into the fat cross. Wonders are to be conquered, not built: I am Hatshepsut the Headbuster and you shall know me by the trail of the dead!
As weâve been given two warriors, one heads south (for the hut) and the other moves north. I name them Dastardly and Muttley. They pop some huts: a map, 25 gold, a scout, who, in 3790 pops Hunting. In the meantime, a border pop at Thebes hutted another map. Our first tech was Animal Husbandry (for the cows). And itâs a worker-first start.
In 3760, we meet our first victim, erm fellow civ, Saladin, whoâs located to the southeast of Thebes, beyond the jungle and desert. Maybe he wonât be Egyptâs first victim. In 3640, our scout huts 48g and, emboldened with his success, decides to take on a bear. It was the last decision he would ever make.
In 3460, we learn the secrets of Animal Husbandry and weâre delighted to discover some Horses within our fat cross. Thatâs the barbs sorted out â war chariots will deal with their threat. Given that theyâre in a riverside plains tile, weâre really sitting on a production powerhouse here. Pop growth will not be very rapid, so Iâll need to be more sparing than usual with the whip. Mining is the next technology on the menu as weâre aiming for Bronzeworking. We need metals.
Tragedy strikes in 3430 when Muttley pops 2 hostiles. Heâs takes one with him to the afterlife. Dastardly meets Lizzy, whose lands lie across the eastern lake. In 3370, Saladin discovers Bhuddism and by 3280 our worker is trained and heads off to pasture those cows. Dastardly bumps into Mansa Musa northeast of the homeland. Hmmmâ¦who to kill first?
Having delivered milk, our worker goes to corral the horses. In 3040 we spot a Barb warrior north of Thebes; itâs surely Muttleyâs killer. Weâre 6 turns away from getting horses connected so weâll have to bide our time here. In 2950, we start our first settler.
As you can see, Iâm not entirely sure where weâll put Memphis. Not much to report until Toku shows up from the west in 2650. In 2560 we learn Bronzeworking and switch to Slavery and begin work on Pottery. Thereâs copper to the south of Thebes, but I want the jumbos and Sal would have to cross desert to grab the copper spot, so itâll still be there when Iâm ready for my third city. The settler is ready in 2440 and I start my first war chariot. Chairman Mao approaches from the west in 2380 and by this time Iâve decided to found Memphis on the plains hill. Itâs going to be another strong production city, so letâs grab that extra hammer and access to more cows.
My chariot completes in 2290 and I decide on another settler. Growth in Thebes is slow, so letâs grow horizontally.
Hardly a distant land, is it? Well thatâs decided then: Mansa will be the first to die. I canât DoW him for a millennium or so, by which time heâll have culture-stolen those cows and have Skirmishers. A glance to the scoreboard will show that weâve now encountered Roosy and Jules, so weâre all set.
In 1790 our settler heads south to claim that copper.
Zapotec isnât a bad location but, typically, it did miss the fish by 1 tile:
I took it in 1090 and, having opened borders, had a look at Djenne in 1000BC and it was guarded by 2 Skirmishers. Weâll be needed catpults for this job. Note the wine farms in Memphis: the 2-1-2 yield is pretty decent considering the alternatives and theyâre also useful pillage magnets (in other circumstances). On completion of Alphabet in 850, I check the AI and decide on Maths next. Trade Writing to Jules for Mysticism and Archery. Get Masonry from Roosevelt for Writing. Saladin gets Agri and Masonry in return for Sailing.
In 670, our brains trust comes up with a new plan: binary research. Their reasoning was that, as a warmonger, weâll want plenty of cash at hand for upgrades. Secondly, weâre not interested in an overall tech lead: each tech we choose is a milestone that enables a new unit (and maybe allows upgrades of old units), so pausing after learning a new tech isnât that harmful to our strategy. Finally, our maintenance cost vs commerce is less than impressive, so running a ânormalâ science percentage wonât yield good results. In 610, Saladin demands I switch to Bhuddism which has just spread into my lands. I decline as I want to be a friendly as possible with Mansa (until I stab in the back). Salâs not happy with me, but do I look bovvered?
In 475 another bit of OB spying reveals that Djenne is garrison by a lone axeman! Time for WAR!
This picture shows a weedy move â I should have put a road on that desert tile so my foot soldiers could save a turn in getting to attack position. By the time I reached Djenne, a Skirmisher had been added to its garrison. The city fell to me in 430 after some heavy fighting. Speaking of weedy moves, I didnât expect Maliâs eastern outpost to have a spearman and my chariot gets killed in the inter-turn.
Construction is learned in 310 and we move for Code of Laws next (for couthouses but mostly because Confucianism is still up for grabs). The war is going to be loooong: Timbuktu is on a hill and guarded by 4 Skirmishers. I also note that Lizzy has built the Pyramids, so sheâs moved ahead of Saladin on my hit-list.
Oh dear, Mansa, thatâs really not very good, is it?
Thereâs fish just to the northwest of Sakae â this will make a very reasonable GPP farm.
In the meantime, my army had marched on Gao (as Timbuktu was far too tough for my troops) and took the city in 160 BC.
In 115 BC, Confucianism is discovered 1 turn before I was due to complete CoL. Bugger. Set research back to 0%. Meanwhile, the dogs of war are at Timbuktuâs gate:
By 40 BC, its cultural defences are gone and itâs time for the assault to begin. Those Skirmishers are very well set, so itâs suicide cats time. The first withdraws, the second loses but inflicts 2.4 hp of damage, the third fails and can only do 0.6 hp of damage. A chariot does 1.3 hp of damage before dying. It looks a bit dodgy for my city raider I Axeman (45%) win chance, but he wins. The two remaining Skirmishers are easily dispatched. In the interturn, a Skirmisher tries to take back Timbuktu, but is defeated by my Axe. Itâs time to make peace, so I demand Meditation and Monotheism from Mansa, as he wonât part with Metal Casting (which the Oracle got him). Mansa now has some pretty poor cities, no metals and, handily for me, only two friends: Lizzy and Roosy.
In 10BC we (belatedly) complete Code of Laws and switch to Compass. Why Compass? Well, itâs great trade fodder and I can see that Jules and Lizzy have got techs I want. Iâm on 0% research in any event. In 5AD, I get Calender from Liz for CoL and Meditation. In 50AD I check why Monarchy is redded by Jules and itâs WFYABTA, so I switch research to Monarchy. Whilst weâve been at war, Heliopolis has been working on a Great Scientist who pops out and heads to Thebes for an Academy. Zapotec has been building the Great Lighthouse for some cash and itâs duly completed elsewhere in 125AD.
Monarchy is completed in 140 and Feudalism is next. Thereâs not much happening at the moment: Iâm building a mixture of infrastructure and troops in preparation for wiping Mansa from the map. Sal closes borders in 185 and in 260 Liz shows up to ask me to convert to Judaism. I agree. In 290, I sell CoL to Mao for 200g and trade him some booze for 2gpt.
In 335, I decide itâs time for the second (and final) Malian campaign.
The attack on Niani goes well, with a (suicide) cat the only casualty. It a terrible site, so it gets razed. Walata falls in similar fashion, but I keep it as it has deer. My troops begin the march on Kumbi Saleh and we learn Feudalism in 425 and follow it with Metal Casting. Naturally enough, we switch to Vassalage. A busy yearâs tech trading see me get Currency from Roosy in exchange for Alphabet and Monarchy, and I sell Jules Alphabet for 340g.
In 440, we revert to no State Religion. The motivation here is that I donât want to have jihad declared against me: I want to decide with whom I go to war and also dictate the timing of the war. At the same time, we start training Hindu missionaries in Timbuktu with the aim of (eventually) taking it as our state religion. Our troops reach Kumbi Saleh in 500 and we take it without problems. Itâs a poor site, so we decide to raze the city.
With Mansa consigned to the dustbin of history, I need to focus on my next victim, Elizabeth. The Pyramids are a wonderful Wonder to steal and her terrain seems pretty reasonable. Saladin just doesnât look tasty enough; heâs not built the Mahabohdi (for me) yet anyway. 605AD is a momentous year; not only do we learn Machinery, but Saladin gives us an inadvertent helping hand:
So we join in immediately. My troops are not perfectly positioned but we donât want Sal to pillage every bloody tile in sight before we can sack Lizzyâs cities. York falls at the cost of a cat and an axe.
Note my nice war chariot and my scout, who fills me in on Londonâs garrison. Hastings is captured on the next turn, thanks to some lucky catapults:
My esteemed war-ally (or should that be partner in crime?), Saladin, offers open borders in 665 which I accept with insincere thanks. Remember my nice war chariot? I left him to garrison York, thinking that Liz had turtled, but no, in 725 she came up with a lucky chariot that took back the city, winning at 20% odds. She had a couple of archers in tow that moved in to re-secure her second oldest city. Thatâll teach me to run needless risks â I could have blocked the road from London but feared a cat attack would hurt my stack too much.
Speaking of London, she fell to me in 770AD:
As well as the Pyramids, I was now the proud owner of the Great Lighthouse. I flip to Rep as I do have the odd specialist assigned here and there. The GP Iâd been working on in Timbuktu pops out in 830 and in 845 he builds the shrine in Djenne. This is one of two Great Wonders Iâll âbuildâ in the entire game. In that same year the double holy city of Nottingham was conquered and York recaptured, for the loss of just one cat. Najran is Lizzyâs last city and must have been flipped from Sal. I wonder what will happen when I raze itâ¦
The Arab is not impressed and gives us a -2 diplo penalty for our troubles. Like we care because youâre next! [cue evil cackle]
Whilst the last turns of the English war were playing out, Jules attacked Mao. This is definitely a Good Thing: geography dictates that Mao will immediately follow Sal into oblivion and it looks like Jules will gladly join in the fun.
Our research over the past three centuries has consisted of Guilds (Knights/Grocers) and now CS (Macemen). Weâre sticking with Vassalage in this game of course. As an aside, I note that I sell Alphabet to Toku for 140gâ¦in 920AD! Weâre in another infrastructure and military phase in preparation for the Arabian campaign. As such thereâs not a great deal to write about. Given that Iâve got a huge amount of land, Iâm trading resources quite heavily and in 1010 CS completes and we go for Engineering (Pikemen). Sal has jumbos and Iâve seen a couple head across my lands in the (vain) hope of taking a barb city up by Julesâs northern lands, so a Pike or two will come in handy.
By 1118, my trigger finger is getting itchy: Sal still hasnât discovered Feudalism, so Iâm very keen to attack before his defences become bothersome. I sell CS to Jules for HBR and 230g. Jules is now Pleased with me, but Iâm delighted to move the science slider up to 100% and complete Eng in five turns. Letâs say it with pictures:
Stroking your lovely beard is not going to save you, sunshine. Time to die! Basra falls instantly and, although I lack Engineering, Iâm sure Iâll have it by the time the jumbos emerge from Maoâs territory. My northern stack moves into position outside Medina and the southern group heads for Baghdad â and will cut off Salâs access to ivory en route. In 1142, both cities are taken. Elsewhere, here come Salâs Jumbos, but with one turn to go before Eng is done, I shouldnât suffer too much:
The AI doesnât have a monopoly on lucky wins, however:
Punishment for a weedy move: Sal split his units into two groups and the Gods made him suffer.
Note Salâs units in Tianjin, as well as Maoâs HA, which is escorting a settler, and is the reason Hastings is training one. In the end, Mao couldnât find a worthwhile site so my settler was (eventually) sent to Memphis and set to sleep. At this point, I switched off research and changed over to Banking: Jules will trade techs (e.g. Literature), but Mao-the-soon-to-die is WFYABTA. In 1160, Sal tries a counterattack, sending two galleys (one of which is empty?!?) up to Basra. This is dealt with but I am left with a slightly damaged Longbow in Basra to (potentially) defend against a sword; Nottingham only has a spearman. Given my bad experience at York, I might need a wee trick. In 1172, Baghdad comes out of revolt but will starve and I can only rush walls. Oh well, pass me my whip!
I decide to leave a worker unprotected near Basra and Salâs sword leaves the safety of the jungle to destroy him. In turn, my crossbow kills the swordsman. Our people shall remember their workerâs sacrifice in their poetry. Around this time, I stopped taking screenshots as it was all a bit too easy: 1184 saw the fall of Mecca and weâre now into mopping up time and I duly take Damascus. Salâs units in the Thebes/Heliopolis jungles are steered towards open ground and slaughtered. In 1202 Rome completes the Great Library(!) and I decide to adopt Hinduism; Iâm far to scary for anyone to consider a crusade.
1208 turns out to be an interesting year. On completion of Banking we switch Civics to Mercantilism and Org Rel. I lose a trade with Toku. WTF? Then the message comes in that Mao has declared war on Japan. This is a Bad Thing: Toku is backward and Mao could roll over him, so I trade Toku copper for 4gpt. I capture Kufah and thatâs the end of Saladin. I already regret keeping Damascus; personal war-weariness blamed for this weedy move.
In 1214, I trade in Literature and start Heroic Epic in Memphis and National Epic in Sakae. Whatâs the plan now? Well, a grab for Liberalism is obvious, but what to claim from it? Nationalism, then research Military Tradition and Cav stomp Jules after killing Mao pre-gunpowder; or what about Chemistry for Grenadier-fueled mayhem? Letâs go for the latter option as it will be quicker. In the shorter term, I want to send out some caravels as the circumnavigation bonus is still on offer.
âSoldâ Feudalism to Toku for 20g in 1220 and rushed the National Epic for 5 pop in Sakae. I am truly despotic. I start to nosy around Maoâs territory with a Knight as I want to know what Iâm up against, especially after he takes Tokyo in 1238. My foot soldiers begin to mass on the Chinese border. In 1274, Jules declares war on Mao, so I decide to join the dogpile.
The two HAs (and settler) get teleported into Tianjin. This, along with an erroneous keypress, nearly leads to my attack failing.
In other news, I circumnavigate (thanks as much to map trading as to my caravels) in 1280.
Hypatia (GS) lightbulbed Education, in case youâre interested. No? You want to hear tales of war instead, eh. Ok, then. Guangzhou was captured for the loss of a (useless) suicide cat, and a crossbow that got killed in an attack out of the city in the preceeding inter-turn. Knights are pretty decent at attacking LBs; that immunity to first strikes is very handy indeed. Iâm saving my CRIII Maces for promotion to grenadiers.
In 1328 I assault Beijing and lose 1 Mace, 1 cat and 1 Mediphantâ¢. Iâve got a few units up at Nanjing, expecting Jules to take it, but he fails dismally, which allows me to cruise in for the loss of one maceman. In 1346, the Taoist holy city of Shanghai is claimed for Egypt for the loss of a knight. It lacks a shrine, annoyingly. The armies then march south to finish off the Chinese.
Chengduâs a bit of a tough nut to crack and I lose a WE, a mace and a cat to capture it in 1388. In my haste to get to Xian before the Romans, I leave a badly wounded Mace outside Chengdu, but I move two CRIII maces to the grassland cottage tile. With my other units on the desert tile (including a Pikeman) thereâs surely no way Maoâs attacking out of there with his 3 HAs. WRONG! Mao has trained 2 Champion-the-WonderHorse-Archers: each kills a Mace at 20%, before the third takes out the damaged maceman. *puts on Jack Sparrow voice* Bugger, bugger, bugger: my beautiful would-be grenadiers destroyed! Sob!
Before all this madness, my Knight had claimed Tokyo and I gifted back to Japan. A weedy move indeed as it immediately border popped right up to Beijing. War-weediness was really taking hold of my brain by this point. Jules razed Xian around 1400, which meant I had to race to claim Kagoshima before he destroyed it. I had three knights against two longbows, but I only needed two. With that, Mao was gone and I poprushed Angkor Watt in London to celebrate.
It was time to take a break for a few days (and play adventure 13) and finish Caesar off for victory at the weekend. The plan was as follows: flip to Free Religion for research and to Caste System for border expansion via Artists. Fill in the gap in my lands (where Iâd razed Kumbi Saleh). Liberalism had been discovered in 1412 and Chemistry taken as planned. The next target is Steel (as you can see) and it can be learned in about a dozen turns. With my circumnavigation bonus, I can attack Neapolis, the Confucian holy city, with galleys laden with grenadiers and catapults. In order to avoid a counterattack into my newly claimed Chinatowns via Japanese territory, I will bribe Toku into ceasing trade with Rome.
By 1490, weâre all set (and back running Slavery) and Japan has closed borders with Rome, which was nice.
War is declared in 1496, with my stack in Shanghai ready to open a second front (or defend against a Roman counterstrike):
Nanjing has a reasonable garrison in case of local difficulties.
In 1502, Steel is discovered and we switch to cannon from grenadiers. Neapolis falls without any trouble. Weâll press onto Rome from the north because Shanghai is witnessing Romeâs main counter-thrust. During the 1502-1508 inter-turn, Jules loses 9 units assaulting my city. His only victory is a Horse Archer defeating a crossbow. I decide to poprush some walls and upgrade an undamaged pikeman to a City Defence III grenadier because thereâs still a whole bunch of units at Shanghaiâs gates. I also suicide a couple of cats for stack damage. The 1508-1514 inter-turn sees Jules bombarding Shanghai and only losing 4 units. Julesâs stack below is now severely depleted and it gets destroyed in 1514. We now march on Jute as well as Rome.
I start to research Theology in 1523. I preferred Org Rel to speed infrastructure and was quite happy for religions to spread around my empire. Despite some unlikely defeats, both Jute and Rome fall in 1532. Theyâll both be quite a few turns in revolt, so might as well press on further.
We march on to Pisae (tucked right up to the American border above) and, having blockaded Polynesian with a caravel, send over some landing parties to claim it for our glorious empire. Both cities fall in 1544, with Pisae being razed to the ground. Now we march on Antium at the same time switching civics back to Org Rel and Caste System: weâll bump our borders with Artist and 90% culture. Antium succumbs and in 1556 itâs all over.
Epic 8 â Potluck
I wonder who Iâll get? I hope itâs Toku or Jules then I can be done by lunchtime. Anyone but Hatty would be fine though. Aha! An email from Gris with the save for Hatshepsut. Oh wellâ¦
Wikipedia tells us this about the first female Pharoah: âHatshepsut was a builder pharaoh. As pharaoh she initiated building projects that were grander and more numerous than those of any of her Middle Kingdom predecessorsâ. Not this incarnation: at Epic speed on a Pangea map, Domination is the way. This approach is reinforced when I examine the start. Itâs a low-food, high production site. I decide to move 1 tile west to bring the Goldmine into the fat cross. Wonders are to be conquered, not built: I am Hatshepsut the Headbuster and you shall know me by the trail of the dead!
As weâve been given two warriors, one heads south (for the hut) and the other moves north. I name them Dastardly and Muttley. They pop some huts: a map, 25 gold, a scout, who, in 3790 pops Hunting. In the meantime, a border pop at Thebes hutted another map. Our first tech was Animal Husbandry (for the cows). And itâs a worker-first start.
In 3760, we meet our first victim, erm fellow civ, Saladin, whoâs located to the southeast of Thebes, beyond the jungle and desert. Maybe he wonât be Egyptâs first victim. In 3640, our scout huts 48g and, emboldened with his success, decides to take on a bear. It was the last decision he would ever make.
In 3460, we learn the secrets of Animal Husbandry and weâre delighted to discover some Horses within our fat cross. Thatâs the barbs sorted out â war chariots will deal with their threat. Given that theyâre in a riverside plains tile, weâre really sitting on a production powerhouse here. Pop growth will not be very rapid, so Iâll need to be more sparing than usual with the whip. Mining is the next technology on the menu as weâre aiming for Bronzeworking. We need metals.
Tragedy strikes in 3430 when Muttley pops 2 hostiles. Heâs takes one with him to the afterlife. Dastardly meets Lizzy, whose lands lie across the eastern lake. In 3370, Saladin discovers Bhuddism and by 3280 our worker is trained and heads off to pasture those cows. Dastardly bumps into Mansa Musa northeast of the homeland. Hmmmâ¦who to kill first?
Having delivered milk, our worker goes to corral the horses. In 3040 we spot a Barb warrior north of Thebes; itâs surely Muttleyâs killer. Weâre 6 turns away from getting horses connected so weâll have to bide our time here. In 2950, we start our first settler.
As you can see, Iâm not entirely sure where weâll put Memphis. Not much to report until Toku shows up from the west in 2650. In 2560 we learn Bronzeworking and switch to Slavery and begin work on Pottery. Thereâs copper to the south of Thebes, but I want the jumbos and Sal would have to cross desert to grab the copper spot, so itâll still be there when Iâm ready for my third city. The settler is ready in 2440 and I start my first war chariot. Chairman Mao approaches from the west in 2380 and by this time Iâve decided to found Memphis on the plains hill. Itâs going to be another strong production city, so letâs grab that extra hammer and access to more cows.
My chariot completes in 2290 and I decide on another settler. Growth in Thebes is slow, so letâs grow horizontally.
Hardly a distant land, is it? Well thatâs decided then: Mansa will be the first to die. I canât DoW him for a millennium or so, by which time heâll have culture-stolen those cows and have Skirmishers. A glance to the scoreboard will show that weâve now encountered Roosy and Jules, so weâre all set.
In 1790 our settler heads south to claim that copper.
Zapotec isnât a bad location but, typically, it did miss the fish by 1 tile:
I took it in 1090 and, having opened borders, had a look at Djenne in 1000BC and it was guarded by 2 Skirmishers. Weâll be needed catpults for this job. Note the wine farms in Memphis: the 2-1-2 yield is pretty decent considering the alternatives and theyâre also useful pillage magnets (in other circumstances). On completion of Alphabet in 850, I check the AI and decide on Maths next. Trade Writing to Jules for Mysticism and Archery. Get Masonry from Roosevelt for Writing. Saladin gets Agri and Masonry in return for Sailing.
In 670, our brains trust comes up with a new plan: binary research. Their reasoning was that, as a warmonger, weâll want plenty of cash at hand for upgrades. Secondly, weâre not interested in an overall tech lead: each tech we choose is a milestone that enables a new unit (and maybe allows upgrades of old units), so pausing after learning a new tech isnât that harmful to our strategy. Finally, our maintenance cost vs commerce is less than impressive, so running a ânormalâ science percentage wonât yield good results. In 610, Saladin demands I switch to Bhuddism which has just spread into my lands. I decline as I want to be a friendly as possible with Mansa (until I stab in the back). Salâs not happy with me, but do I look bovvered?
In 475 another bit of OB spying reveals that Djenne is garrison by a lone axeman! Time for WAR!
This picture shows a weedy move â I should have put a road on that desert tile so my foot soldiers could save a turn in getting to attack position. By the time I reached Djenne, a Skirmisher had been added to its garrison. The city fell to me in 430 after some heavy fighting. Speaking of weedy moves, I didnât expect Maliâs eastern outpost to have a spearman and my chariot gets killed in the inter-turn.
Construction is learned in 310 and we move for Code of Laws next (for couthouses but mostly because Confucianism is still up for grabs). The war is going to be loooong: Timbuktu is on a hill and guarded by 4 Skirmishers. I also note that Lizzy has built the Pyramids, so sheâs moved ahead of Saladin on my hit-list.
Oh dear, Mansa, thatâs really not very good, is it?
Thereâs fish just to the northwest of Sakae â this will make a very reasonable GPP farm.
In the meantime, my army had marched on Gao (as Timbuktu was far too tough for my troops) and took the city in 160 BC.
In 115 BC, Confucianism is discovered 1 turn before I was due to complete CoL. Bugger. Set research back to 0%. Meanwhile, the dogs of war are at Timbuktuâs gate:
By 40 BC, its cultural defences are gone and itâs time for the assault to begin. Those Skirmishers are very well set, so itâs suicide cats time. The first withdraws, the second loses but inflicts 2.4 hp of damage, the third fails and can only do 0.6 hp of damage. A chariot does 1.3 hp of damage before dying. It looks a bit dodgy for my city raider I Axeman (45%) win chance, but he wins. The two remaining Skirmishers are easily dispatched. In the interturn, a Skirmisher tries to take back Timbuktu, but is defeated by my Axe. Itâs time to make peace, so I demand Meditation and Monotheism from Mansa, as he wonât part with Metal Casting (which the Oracle got him). Mansa now has some pretty poor cities, no metals and, handily for me, only two friends: Lizzy and Roosy.
In 10BC we (belatedly) complete Code of Laws and switch to Compass. Why Compass? Well, itâs great trade fodder and I can see that Jules and Lizzy have got techs I want. Iâm on 0% research in any event. In 5AD, I get Calender from Liz for CoL and Meditation. In 50AD I check why Monarchy is redded by Jules and itâs WFYABTA, so I switch research to Monarchy. Whilst weâve been at war, Heliopolis has been working on a Great Scientist who pops out and heads to Thebes for an Academy. Zapotec has been building the Great Lighthouse for some cash and itâs duly completed elsewhere in 125AD.
Monarchy is completed in 140 and Feudalism is next. Thereâs not much happening at the moment: Iâm building a mixture of infrastructure and troops in preparation for wiping Mansa from the map. Sal closes borders in 185 and in 260 Liz shows up to ask me to convert to Judaism. I agree. In 290, I sell CoL to Mao for 200g and trade him some booze for 2gpt.
In 335, I decide itâs time for the second (and final) Malian campaign.
The attack on Niani goes well, with a (suicide) cat the only casualty. It a terrible site, so it gets razed. Walata falls in similar fashion, but I keep it as it has deer. My troops begin the march on Kumbi Saleh and we learn Feudalism in 425 and follow it with Metal Casting. Naturally enough, we switch to Vassalage. A busy yearâs tech trading see me get Currency from Roosy in exchange for Alphabet and Monarchy, and I sell Jules Alphabet for 340g.
In 440, we revert to no State Religion. The motivation here is that I donât want to have jihad declared against me: I want to decide with whom I go to war and also dictate the timing of the war. At the same time, we start training Hindu missionaries in Timbuktu with the aim of (eventually) taking it as our state religion. Our troops reach Kumbi Saleh in 500 and we take it without problems. Itâs a poor site, so we decide to raze the city.
With Mansa consigned to the dustbin of history, I need to focus on my next victim, Elizabeth. The Pyramids are a wonderful Wonder to steal and her terrain seems pretty reasonable. Saladin just doesnât look tasty enough; heâs not built the Mahabohdi (for me) yet anyway. 605AD is a momentous year; not only do we learn Machinery, but Saladin gives us an inadvertent helping hand:
So we join in immediately. My troops are not perfectly positioned but we donât want Sal to pillage every bloody tile in sight before we can sack Lizzyâs cities. York falls at the cost of a cat and an axe.
Note my nice war chariot and my scout, who fills me in on Londonâs garrison. Hastings is captured on the next turn, thanks to some lucky catapults:
My esteemed war-ally (or should that be partner in crime?), Saladin, offers open borders in 665 which I accept with insincere thanks. Remember my nice war chariot? I left him to garrison York, thinking that Liz had turtled, but no, in 725 she came up with a lucky chariot that took back the city, winning at 20% odds. She had a couple of archers in tow that moved in to re-secure her second oldest city. Thatâll teach me to run needless risks â I could have blocked the road from London but feared a cat attack would hurt my stack too much.
Speaking of London, she fell to me in 770AD:
As well as the Pyramids, I was now the proud owner of the Great Lighthouse. I flip to Rep as I do have the odd specialist assigned here and there. The GP Iâd been working on in Timbuktu pops out in 830 and in 845 he builds the shrine in Djenne. This is one of two Great Wonders Iâll âbuildâ in the entire game. In that same year the double holy city of Nottingham was conquered and York recaptured, for the loss of just one cat. Najran is Lizzyâs last city and must have been flipped from Sal. I wonder what will happen when I raze itâ¦
The Arab is not impressed and gives us a -2 diplo penalty for our troubles. Like we care because youâre next! [cue evil cackle]
Whilst the last turns of the English war were playing out, Jules attacked Mao. This is definitely a Good Thing: geography dictates that Mao will immediately follow Sal into oblivion and it looks like Jules will gladly join in the fun.
Our research over the past three centuries has consisted of Guilds (Knights/Grocers) and now CS (Macemen). Weâre sticking with Vassalage in this game of course. As an aside, I note that I sell Alphabet to Toku for 140gâ¦in 920AD! Weâre in another infrastructure and military phase in preparation for the Arabian campaign. As such thereâs not a great deal to write about. Given that Iâve got a huge amount of land, Iâm trading resources quite heavily and in 1010 CS completes and we go for Engineering (Pikemen). Sal has jumbos and Iâve seen a couple head across my lands in the (vain) hope of taking a barb city up by Julesâs northern lands, so a Pike or two will come in handy.
By 1118, my trigger finger is getting itchy: Sal still hasnât discovered Feudalism, so Iâm very keen to attack before his defences become bothersome. I sell CS to Jules for HBR and 230g. Jules is now Pleased with me, but Iâm delighted to move the science slider up to 100% and complete Eng in five turns. Letâs say it with pictures:
Stroking your lovely beard is not going to save you, sunshine. Time to die! Basra falls instantly and, although I lack Engineering, Iâm sure Iâll have it by the time the jumbos emerge from Maoâs territory. My northern stack moves into position outside Medina and the southern group heads for Baghdad â and will cut off Salâs access to ivory en route. In 1142, both cities are taken. Elsewhere, here come Salâs Jumbos, but with one turn to go before Eng is done, I shouldnât suffer too much:
The AI doesnât have a monopoly on lucky wins, however:
Punishment for a weedy move: Sal split his units into two groups and the Gods made him suffer.
Note Salâs units in Tianjin, as well as Maoâs HA, which is escorting a settler, and is the reason Hastings is training one. In the end, Mao couldnât find a worthwhile site so my settler was (eventually) sent to Memphis and set to sleep. At this point, I switched off research and changed over to Banking: Jules will trade techs (e.g. Literature), but Mao-the-soon-to-die is WFYABTA. In 1160, Sal tries a counterattack, sending two galleys (one of which is empty?!?) up to Basra. This is dealt with but I am left with a slightly damaged Longbow in Basra to (potentially) defend against a sword; Nottingham only has a spearman. Given my bad experience at York, I might need a wee trick. In 1172, Baghdad comes out of revolt but will starve and I can only rush walls. Oh well, pass me my whip!
I decide to leave a worker unprotected near Basra and Salâs sword leaves the safety of the jungle to destroy him. In turn, my crossbow kills the swordsman. Our people shall remember their workerâs sacrifice in their poetry. Around this time, I stopped taking screenshots as it was all a bit too easy: 1184 saw the fall of Mecca and weâre now into mopping up time and I duly take Damascus. Salâs units in the Thebes/Heliopolis jungles are steered towards open ground and slaughtered. In 1202 Rome completes the Great Library(!) and I decide to adopt Hinduism; Iâm far to scary for anyone to consider a crusade.
1208 turns out to be an interesting year. On completion of Banking we switch Civics to Mercantilism and Org Rel. I lose a trade with Toku. WTF? Then the message comes in that Mao has declared war on Japan. This is a Bad Thing: Toku is backward and Mao could roll over him, so I trade Toku copper for 4gpt. I capture Kufah and thatâs the end of Saladin. I already regret keeping Damascus; personal war-weariness blamed for this weedy move.
In 1214, I trade in Literature and start Heroic Epic in Memphis and National Epic in Sakae. Whatâs the plan now? Well, a grab for Liberalism is obvious, but what to claim from it? Nationalism, then research Military Tradition and Cav stomp Jules after killing Mao pre-gunpowder; or what about Chemistry for Grenadier-fueled mayhem? Letâs go for the latter option as it will be quicker. In the shorter term, I want to send out some caravels as the circumnavigation bonus is still on offer.
âSoldâ Feudalism to Toku for 20g in 1220 and rushed the National Epic for 5 pop in Sakae. I am truly despotic. I start to nosy around Maoâs territory with a Knight as I want to know what Iâm up against, especially after he takes Tokyo in 1238. My foot soldiers begin to mass on the Chinese border. In 1274, Jules declares war on Mao, so I decide to join the dogpile.
The two HAs (and settler) get teleported into Tianjin. This, along with an erroneous keypress, nearly leads to my attack failing.
In other news, I circumnavigate (thanks as much to map trading as to my caravels) in 1280.
Hypatia (GS) lightbulbed Education, in case youâre interested. No? You want to hear tales of war instead, eh. Ok, then. Guangzhou was captured for the loss of a (useless) suicide cat, and a crossbow that got killed in an attack out of the city in the preceeding inter-turn. Knights are pretty decent at attacking LBs; that immunity to first strikes is very handy indeed. Iâm saving my CRIII Maces for promotion to grenadiers.
In 1328 I assault Beijing and lose 1 Mace, 1 cat and 1 Mediphantâ¢. Iâve got a few units up at Nanjing, expecting Jules to take it, but he fails dismally, which allows me to cruise in for the loss of one maceman. In 1346, the Taoist holy city of Shanghai is claimed for Egypt for the loss of a knight. It lacks a shrine, annoyingly. The armies then march south to finish off the Chinese.
Chengduâs a bit of a tough nut to crack and I lose a WE, a mace and a cat to capture it in 1388. In my haste to get to Xian before the Romans, I leave a badly wounded Mace outside Chengdu, but I move two CRIII maces to the grassland cottage tile. With my other units on the desert tile (including a Pikeman) thereâs surely no way Maoâs attacking out of there with his 3 HAs. WRONG! Mao has trained 2 Champion-the-WonderHorse-Archers: each kills a Mace at 20%, before the third takes out the damaged maceman. *puts on Jack Sparrow voice* Bugger, bugger, bugger: my beautiful would-be grenadiers destroyed! Sob!
Before all this madness, my Knight had claimed Tokyo and I gifted back to Japan. A weedy move indeed as it immediately border popped right up to Beijing. War-weediness was really taking hold of my brain by this point. Jules razed Xian around 1400, which meant I had to race to claim Kagoshima before he destroyed it. I had three knights against two longbows, but I only needed two. With that, Mao was gone and I poprushed Angkor Watt in London to celebrate.
It was time to take a break for a few days (and play adventure 13) and finish Caesar off for victory at the weekend. The plan was as follows: flip to Free Religion for research and to Caste System for border expansion via Artists. Fill in the gap in my lands (where Iâd razed Kumbi Saleh). Liberalism had been discovered in 1412 and Chemistry taken as planned. The next target is Steel (as you can see) and it can be learned in about a dozen turns. With my circumnavigation bonus, I can attack Neapolis, the Confucian holy city, with galleys laden with grenadiers and catapults. In order to avoid a counterattack into my newly claimed Chinatowns via Japanese territory, I will bribe Toku into ceasing trade with Rome.
By 1490, weâre all set (and back running Slavery) and Japan has closed borders with Rome, which was nice.
War is declared in 1496, with my stack in Shanghai ready to open a second front (or defend against a Roman counterstrike):
Nanjing has a reasonable garrison in case of local difficulties.
In 1502, Steel is discovered and we switch to cannon from grenadiers. Neapolis falls without any trouble. Weâll press onto Rome from the north because Shanghai is witnessing Romeâs main counter-thrust. During the 1502-1508 inter-turn, Jules loses 9 units assaulting my city. His only victory is a Horse Archer defeating a crossbow. I decide to poprush some walls and upgrade an undamaged pikeman to a City Defence III grenadier because thereâs still a whole bunch of units at Shanghaiâs gates. I also suicide a couple of cats for stack damage. The 1508-1514 inter-turn sees Jules bombarding Shanghai and only losing 4 units. Julesâs stack below is now severely depleted and it gets destroyed in 1514. We now march on Jute as well as Rome.
I start to research Theology in 1523. I preferred Org Rel to speed infrastructure and was quite happy for religions to spread around my empire. Despite some unlikely defeats, both Jute and Rome fall in 1532. Theyâll both be quite a few turns in revolt, so might as well press on further.
We march on to Pisae (tucked right up to the American border above) and, having blockaded Polynesian with a caravel, send over some landing parties to claim it for our glorious empire. Both cities fall in 1544, with Pisae being razed to the ground. Now we march on Antium at the same time switching civics back to Org Rel and Caste System: weâll bump our borders with Artist and 90% culture. Antium succumbs and in 1556 itâs all over.