Team: 5 or 6 Players
Classes: The 5 Knights are all Paladins. The Squire is a Barbarian.
Tag: Giving your character the same name as the knight he is playing is encouraged.
To introduce this team variant, I need only provide you with this link: The Black Knight!! Now that you're back you should understand this variant. If that wonderful Diablo toon wasn't enough to clue you in, immediately switch off your computer and rent "Monty Python and the Holy Grail." If you have not seen this movie, read no further - it's much better if you see the movie first!
(Note: Despite the fact that the Diablo toon was for Diablo 1, this variant is for Diablo 2. At least for now... Muhahahaha! The Diablo toon was made by Tryon.)
The characters are King Arthur, Sir Bedevere, Sir Galahad, Sir Launcelot, and Sir Robin. Patsy the Squire is an optional role that may be filled by either a sixth player or a mercenary. (Patsy's - Player Character - rules are separate and listed after the quest section.)
There are a few overriding rules that apply to all seekers of the Holy Grail. The individual knights, however, have a few rules specific to their character.
Mages are seen as dangerous. All due caution must be used when dealing with them. And the knights themselves are not enchanters, so certain skills that are too sorcerer-like are disallowed (more below).
Should one of his noble companions fall on the battlefield, King Arthur must shout "RUN AWAY!!!" and his team must flee from battle! (During certain quests you may wish to ignore this rule so that the quest can be completed.) Brave Sir Robin will turn and flee whenever a fellow knight dies - even if it occurs during a quest! He will not return to battle until the fallen has gotten his body back.
Sir Galahad the Pure will never attack a female, enemy or otherwise. By contrast, Sir Bedevere will attack all females, because he suspects they may be witches. If Sir Bedevere sees a female enemy he'll drop what he's doing and run to attack her. (Unless, of course, he's already attacking a female enemy.)
Town Guards (aka Legionnaires) and Iron Wolf mercenaries may not be hired by any seekers of the Grail. Iron Wolves are mages, who the knights are wary of. And Legionnaires are rude French Guards that prevent Arthur and Co. from entering the Castle of Catapulted Livestock and the Castle Arrgghhh.
If no player is filling in the role of Patsy the Squire, Arthur may hire a Barbarian mercenary to fill in that role. Patsy the Squire (Merc) may not wield a weapon, except for carrying such an item between games.
Rogue mercenaries must be hired by all of Arthur's knights. If Patsy (Player Character) is present, Arthur and Patsy must both hire them as well. Otherwise Arthur may choose between hiring Patsy (Merc) and a Rogue.
Rogue mercenaries are Sir Robin's minstrels, and because they are minstrels (not archers) they may not be given bows to use. They may, however, be given armor and helm to wear in order to keep them alive. The team should strive to keep the minstrels alive at all times, but if they are in financial trouble they may be forced to eat them (take their armor/helm and sell for cash, and then not resurrect when the minstrel dies). Minstrels should return to play as soon as reasonably possible.
Armor
Any, but will wear metal armor as soon as it becomes available.
Boots, Belts, Gloves
Any.
Arthur has a preference for Light Gauntlets/Gauntlets.
Bedevere has a preference for Chain Gloves.
The other knights prefer a leather glove of some sort.
Helms
Arthur may wear crowns, and once found he must wear one.
Galahad does not wear helms, but he may use Circlets, Coronets, Diadems, and Tiaras.
Bedevere is a buckethead, and must use a face-covering helm (Full Helms, Great Helms) as soon as possible.
Launcelot and Robin use non-bucket helms, such as Skull Caps and Helms.
None of the troupe may use Bone Helms, Masks, or Caps.
Shield
Shield use is optional, except for Robin who must always use the biggest shield he can find.
The shield bears the adventurer's symbol. Each knight has a different symbol, which carries a meaning.
The meaning of the symbol determines enchantment usage. A shield with a symbol is worth much more to the knights than one without. The knights must use a shield that bears their symbol once found (if they choose to use a shield). The shield is still considered to bear the knight's symbol even if the particular desired effect is provided from an item insterted in the shield.
Arthur's symbols are +Light (possible via El rune), -Requirements ("Light" as in weight), Resist all, +All skills (such as on "Sigon's Guard" - "Monk's" and "Priest's" are also allowed).
Bedevere's symbols are +Hps, Life regeneration ("Regeneration" possible at higher levels), Attacker takes damage, Damage taken goes to mana.
Galahad's symbols are Poison length reduction, Poison resistance, Repairs durability, +Paladin skills ("Monk"/"Priest" enchantments), Godly/Holy/Saintly/Blessed.
Launcelot's symbols are +Str, +Damage ("Maiming" possible), Faster hit recovery speed, +Paladin Combat Skills/Offfensive auras.
Robin's symbols are +Defense, +Blocking, Faster hit recovery speed, Damage/Magic damage reduction, +Paladin Defensive auras.
If Sir Robin uses an Auric Shield ("Paladin Only"), he prefers those with resistance over the +Damage/+AR kind - though the ultimate deciding factor is how big it is.
Sir Robin will never, ever be without a shield. Also, because he is so cowardly he will pump Dexterity over everything else until he gets 75% Blocking. When he levels up, he will always check his block % before assigning points. If his current block % is less than 75% (with Holy Shield - assuming he uses it) he will assign points to dexterity until his blocking is 75%.
Weapons
Swords class only. One-handed or Two-handed swords are both acceptable.
Sir Robin can use only one-handed swords. To do otherwise would remove his ability to cower behind his shield.
Arthur is the only knight in the troupe who can use the mighty Holy Hand Grenade (Oil Potions), but he may only use it against the Rabbit of Caer Bannog. Arthur must have at least 25 Oil Potions ready for the battle with the Rabbit.
Enchantments/Rares/Sets/Uniques
Enchantment emphasis is on direct combat modifiers: Defense, Blocking, Damage, Attack Rating, Hit Recovery, Block Speed, Swing Speed. Enchanted items must have such a modifier, else they cannot be used.
Royal sounding items and such with "King" in the title are reserved for Arthur alone. Once found, a Royal or Kingly item must be used.
They will never use Poison Damage items (Anthrax is hated in particular) or unholy-sounding items. This is a holy quest, not an unholy one!
As far as "cast X on striking" goes, only Amplify Damage seems ok - so no "cast firebolt on striking," etc. (Iceblink style Freeze Target and Coif of Glory style Blinding also seem ok.) Skill charges (aside from melee skills) are disallowed entirely.
Combat Skills
Blessed Hammer and Holy Bolt are Cleric-Mage skills, and are out.
Sacrifice, Smite, Zeal, Charge, Vengeance, and Holy Shield are allowed to all knights, with some restrictions.
Offensive Auras
Neither Arthur nor his knights are enchanters, so they will never make use of Holy Fire, Holy Shock, Holy Freeze, or Sanctuary. Thorns is disallowed for simply not making sense. Conviction is also disallowed. As they were not enchanters, they have no ability to substantially lower the defenses or resistances of their enemies.
King Arthur, a natural leader, is the only warrior who can instil Fanaticism in his noble knights.
Sir Robin, a coward, will never use an offensive aura of his own. He prefers defensive auras, particularly "Defiance" with which to protect himself, and "Vigor" with which to flee.
Defensive Auras
Salvation and Redemption are the jobs of a priest, and none of the knights, nor Arthur, is a clergyman. These two skills are out.
Everyone is able to pray, though God seems to hate it when people are always groveling. (See the scene where God delivers the quest.) Also, all knights (and Arthur) are able to use the single resistance auras.
Sir Robin excels in one area: Saving his own skin! He is the only knight able to use Defiance and Vigor.
Sir Galahad has a fondness of "Cleansing" after his stay at Castle Anthrax. (He should get slvl 1, but pumping is optional.) And he alone may use Cleansing, as he is the purest of them.
Sir Bedevere is the wisest of them, and he alone may sit and dwell upon things. (Meditation is allowed to Bedevere only, and his good thinking helps the team as a whole.)
Quests are not optional, and must be done in every difficulty. Quests are not necessarily in the order that they appeared in the movie.
1) The Holy Grail
This is the main objective of those that seek the Holy Grail: to, uh, find the Holy Grail, of course! Arthur and his men will never pass up an opportunity to find the Grail, and will search every golden chest for it. After all, the Grail could be anywhere!
The Grail itself is elusive, and will never be found by the knights. However, this doesn't stop their tireless searching!
Alternatively, the team may select an item(s) and adventure until said item(s) is found. For example, they may select the bow "Windforce" as their grail. Or they might select a rune word item as their grail. Or they could select a set of items as the grail.
2) Camelot
'Tis a silly place. The knights will not visit Arthur's wife, Guinevere (aka the Countess), at Camelot unless they, too, intend to act silly.
Camelot (the Forgotten Tower) may only be entered if the knights disarm themselves prior to entry. They must party with everyone there (fully clear each dlvl) and sing a song of some sort while they dance. (I'd suggest a song where one would sing a line, then someone else would chime in with the next line, and so on.)
3) Three-Headed Knight
While the rest of the party adventures in the wilderness (Tamoe Highlands), brave Sir Robin will run ahead until he finds the Three-Headed Knight (the Smith). He will then flee from the fearsome knight, and end up leading the beast back to his party! (If the party is underground when Robin returns with the knight in tow, he must lead the knight to the dungeon entrance and then run around singing about his braveness until his party comes to his rescue. If you can't type that fast, merely alert them to the knight's presence.)
The Three-Headed Knight also appears in Act 4 (Hephasto) and in Act 5 (Thresh Socket). This quest should be repeated in these places as well. (Sir Robin runs off when the first midget dungeon in 3 is complete, when they enter the River of Flame in 4, and when they enter the Frigid Highlands in 5.)
4) Castle Anthrax
Once the party has triumphed over the Three-Headed Knight and are in possession of his sacred Malus (turn in the Malus), Sir Galahad leaves and goes off on his own. (Sir Galahad creates a new game.) He then forges ahead as fast as possible until he comes upon the beautiful women of Castle Anthrax, Zoot (Andariel). He should kill as few demons as possible on his way there. In the end, he swoons at the feet of Zoot (dies to her). At this time his friends come upon him and rescue him from this foul mistress. (Galahad whispers his party to come to the new game and save him.)
When rescuing Sir Galahad from Zoot, Arthur, Robin, and Bedevere are not required to be played in role. (This is because in the movie, they weren't actually there.)
5) The Damsel in Distress
When Sir Launcelot finds the Horadric Note (Scroll) strapped to an arrow which was fired into his squire, he learns of the plight of a poor damsel being kept prisoner and being forced into an arranged marriage! He will not allow for this! He bids his friends good-bye and sets out to find this beautiful maiden in need of rescue.
He roams the desert searching and searching for the Viper Temple, where the fair maiden is to be married. Once he finds it, he will use his Zealousness (Zeal skill) to slay every monster he sees and rescue the fair maiden.
On the lower level of the temple he finally finds her... No, him! Prince Fangskin sits at the altar, crying his eyes out that he doesn't want to be married! Launcelot must smash the altar and release the Light, blinding his audience so that he can escape without being embarrassed by trying to save a whiny prince in distress! It is Launcelot's choice whether or not to kill Fangskin the Whiny Prince.
Later, in Act 5, another damsel is learned of. Upon hearing of Anya from Malah, Sir Launcelot will once again set out on his own in an attempt to find her and rescue her from being wed to Frozenstein! Monsters encountered on the way to Anya are trivial and need not be slain unless they stand in Launcelot's way. In the Frozen River, Launcelot must slay all enemies he sees. (As before, he must use Zeal during this entire quest.)
6) The Witch Test
Sir Bedevere has the keen sense to tell a Witch from a non-Witch. When he learns of a "Summoner," he investigates it immediately. Well, after his fellow knights pass their best fire resistance items to him for use on this quest. (He gives them back after the quest, or if he doesn't need the item.)
Streak through the Palace to the AS and begin searching for Summoner. The others must stay behind and fully clear the Palace and Harem to give Bedevere enough time to find the Summoner. If this is still not enough time, the troupe must clear the areas of the AS that Bedevere already searched. (He will likely do only one "arm" in order to check for Summoner, so they can clear the arms he skipped.) When the Summoner is found, Bedevere calls to his comrades and summons them to his location. Bedevere then administers... the Drake1 Test!
Hoping his comrades in arms will absorb the magical attacks of the Summoner Witch, Bedevere makes his way to the top of the platform and then drops a "Drake's" item (or a +Mana ring, if such an item is not available).
"Now, what do we know about witches?"
"They burn!"
"And what also burns?"
"Uh... Wood?"
"Correct! Wood also burns, so they must be made of wood. But wood also has what other property?"
"Um..."
"It floats, and since a witch is made of wood she will also float. What is another object that floats?"
"A... duck?"
"So for a witch to float she must weigh as much as a duck!"
"Aye!"
When Bedevere sees the Summoner floating above the ground, then sees his Drake standing flat on the ground, he will deduce that the Summoner is a Witch because she is floating! Dispatch the foul witch quickly!
Later, in Act 5, you will meet another witch: Nihlathak. Sir Bedevere has a much more dangerous task here, but he must still repeat the necessary steps to prove that the man is a witch!
1: Drake in this sense means "duck." Quack, quack!
7) The Castle of Guy de Loimbard
Guy de Loimbard has the most annoying guardsman you could ever run across: Stormtree. He protects the entrance to Kurast and insults you with no provocation! The cunning knights must find a way to get past him... but how?
Aha! The Trojan Rabbit! If Patsy (Player Character or Merc) are present, dress him up like a rabbit. Give him some sort of winged primal helm (e.g. Avenger Guard) and send him to Stormtree.
Patsy (Player Character) must use Rabbit Hops (Leap) during this sequence, and may not walk normally. His goal is to make it past Stormtree and into Kurast alive. If he succeeds, he sends a portal to his companions and they come rescue him from the danger he is surely in.
Patsy (Merc) is splatted by Stormtree and the knights must find another way to get past him.
If no Patsy is present, or if Patsy fails to get you into the Castle, you must resort to violence. However, whenever you attack Stormtree he throws livestock at you (CBolts)! The knights must be crafty in order to take down this bothersome foe.
There is only one object strong enough to protect them from hurled livestock: The Holy Blade Gidbinn! One at a time, each knight wields Gidbinn and attempts to slay Stormtree. If he is routed or dies, he passes the blade to the next knight, and so on.
If Gidbinn is already turned in to Ormus, the safest way to kill Stormtree is from a distance! Everybody grab a bow and start firing!
Eventually, you will make it into the Castle (Kurast). ;)
8) The Knights Who Say "Ni!"
"Silence! Or we will say 'Ni' to you again!" You heard them - don't you dare anger those Knights! The Knights Who Say Ni (the Black Council of Travincal) demand a shrubbery! After meeting them, the seekers of the Grail must re-visit Kurast and seek out an item that can pass for a shrubbery.
Hmm, but what could a shrubbery be? Well, what do we know about shrubs? They can scrape you. But what causes them to scrape you? Sharp thorns! So an item with "Thorns" must be... a shrubbery!! Obtain a Shrubbery and take back to the Knights Who Say Ni.
Upon returning with the shrubbery to the Knights Who Say Ni, they reveal that they are no longer the Knights Who Say Ni. The Knights Who Until Recently Said Ni now demand... another! shrubbery! Arthur then says the word that the knights cannot stand!
One of the seekers of the Grail must remember what word (in the movie) was that the Knights Who Until Recently Said Ni cannot stand. If nobody recalls this word, the team may not kill the Knights and gain passage! Furthermore, all of you must immediately power off your machine and go rent "Monty Python and the Holy Grail" and watch the film until you do know! ;)
And in case you're trying to merely guess, the word is not mentioned in this quest anywhere. But I do have this to say to you: Ni!
9) The Bridge of Death
"He who seeks to pass through me first must answer questions three e'er the other side he see." These immortal words spoken by the Keeper of the Bridge of Death (Mephisto) are as true today as they ever were. After clearing level 3 of the Durance of all enemies except the Keeper, the group must prepare themselves to answer his questions so that they may gain passage. (Do not damage the Keeper yet.)
Sir Launcelot goes first, followed by brave Sir Robin, Sir Galahad, King Arthur, and Sir Bedevere. Before being questioned you may humble yourself before the wizened old Keeper. (Knights are not build to be damage sponges. If you want to take off your regular gear and wear HP/Resistance gear to give you a better chance of surviving the questioning, that's ok. Regular gear should be re-equipped after questioning, however.) And be sure to have no weapon readied. If you attack him, you'll be cast off into the Pit of Death, which is failure.
When ready, the knight goes alone to the Keeper and is asked three questions. (He allows himself to be hit by 3 of Mephisto's 4 different attacks: Skull/Ice Orb, Melee Smack, Poison, Charged Bolt.) If he survives, he runs off to a safe place. Any knights who fail their questioning must restart in/go back to town, and they cannot participate in the upcoming battle. (Note: During questioning you may not drink rejuvenation potions. Reds only. And Mephy must stay on-screen at all times, or else you fail.)
Knights who survived are worthy of passage, but there's no reason to leave their buddies on the other side of the bridge. They decide to kill the Keeper so that their fellow knights may pass the Bridge of Death (the skull path across the lava to the Portal to Hell). Knights who failed questioning may not participate in this battle.
10) The Blue Knight
The Black Knight, Jim, was casually dismembered in Arthur's first meeting with him (in D1 on dlvl 16). Brother to the Black Knight, the Blue Knight (Izual) wishes to avenge his brother's death! But like Jim, the Blue Knight never admits defeat! Arthur tells his knights to leave this battle to him.
The brave King chooses any two-handed sword that he wishes, and the one-on-one battle begins. (Other knights may watch, but may not tank for Arthur or distract the Blue Knight.) At various points in the battle he must announce when the knight has lost an appendage. One of his knights should chime in as the Blue Knight's voice, rebutting Arthur's claim. If Arthur doesn't announce the loss of all 4 of the knight's appendages, he fails and must battle the Blue Knight in a new game.
When the Blue Knight is slain, his spirit appears in a last act of defiance! Be sure to speak with Tyrael the Priest so that the Blue Knight is properly exorcised.
11) The Red Knight
Also kin to the Black Knight is the Red Knight. He, too, was previously slain by Arthur, but now, thanks to a drunken conjuror, he has returned as a fearsome dragon! Arthur insists that all of his knights assist him in this battle. And, like always, if someone should die (excluding Patsy and the Minstrels) Arthur should sound the retreat ("RUN AWAY!!") so that they may regroup.
After the Red Knight falls, Tyrael should again be consulted for exorcism. He promises to do so, and then sends you to a cold and snowy land.
Sadly, the Red Knight managed to eat all of Sir Robin's minstrels during the battle. (Minstrels may not be resurrected until further notice. If any minstrels are still alive, get them killed before beginning the next quest.)
12) The Cave
Immediately upon entering Harrogath Arthur runs into Tim the Enchanter and asks the mage about the Holy Grail. No Act 5 quests are done at all until this quest is complete.
Tim may be any Sorceress or Elemental Druid - so long as they are proficient in fire magic. Tim is outside help - never a member of the team. Once he pledges his assistance, he must provide them with the Ancients Way waypoint. The group searches for awhile until they find the Cave. (When they find the Arreat Summit exit, Tim must leave the game if he hasn't done so already. And be sure to thank Tim for his help.)
Before Tim left he told them about the Guardian of the Cave - the Rabbit of Caer Bannog (Korlic)! Arthur prepares himself by packing Holy Hand Grenades (Oil Potions) into his pack. They then begin battle!
The Rabbit of Caer Bannog has allies, however, and they must be slain first! (Kill them first, but do not so much as TOUCH Korlic yet.) After the Rabbit's companions die, Arthur's knights run up and crowd around the Rabbit so it cannot escape! (Tank it!) They will, however, not attack the Rabbit yet, for it is time for Arthur to use the Holy Hand Grenades! First, he must find out how to use them. (The following is just for flavor. You don't need to read it aloud in-game. In fact, if you do, you'll probably get splatted. ;)
"And St. Attila raised his hand grenade up on high saying 'O Lord bless this thy hand grenade that with it thou mayest blow thine enemies to tiny bits, in thy mercy.' And the Lord did grin and the people did feast upon the lambs and sloths and carp and anchovies and orangutans and breakfast cereals and fruit bats and..."
"Erm...let's skip a bit..."
"... Er ... oh, yes ... and the Lord spake, saying, 'First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin, then shalt thou count to three, no more, no less. Three shalt be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shalt be three. Four shalt thou not count, neither count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thou foe, who being naughty in my sight, shall snuff it.'" -excerpt from movie provided by Carbon Copy
Arthur must now count to three and begin chucking Holy Hand Grenades! (Yes, Arthur must count! And someone should pipe up to correct his counting error! :)
"1... 2... 5!"
"3, sire!"
"3!"
Now begin chucking and don't stop until all Grenades in Arthur's pack are gone! Once Arthur is out of Grenades, the Rabbit of Caer Bannog is weakened and is finished off by the group.
During the battle, should any Knight die, he may not return to the battle unless the entire team has died. If Arthur dies before he ran out of Grenades, the group must start the battle over.
When this quest is complete Robin's minstrels may return.
13) Castle Arrrggh
Within the cave the knights are assailed by a gigantic monster known as Lister! With its dying breath it tells where to find the Grail - in castle Arrrgh!
Luckily, there's a portal opened that'll take you directly into the heart of Castle Arrrrgh! And now, in the middle of England, you must face off with Baal the French Duke! He will taunt you and dump waste buckets on you, but do not retreat! Any retreat to town during battle will get you arrested by the police! (Also, Charge may not be used during this battle for its retreat requirement.)
When Baal dies, you may loot his treasury for the Holy Grail! (Will it be there? Or elsewhere?!)
Class: Barbarian
Patsy is the squire of King Arthur. He is an optional character and is not crucial to the team. He does, however, make a very nice pack mule for just about anything (especially Arthur's Holy Hand Grenade collection).
Patsy is a clean-up guy for the most part. He runs along picking up stray jewelry, runes, and other items. He identifies magical things and cubes useless things.
Patsy will never charge into combat for any reason. (He may run among the knights and pick up goodies that drop, but he won't run in and smack something - nor will he run ahead of them.) If during his pick-up duty he is attacked, he may attack back - and sound the "Help!" hotkey at the same time! - and run to hide, but he may not start a fight on his own. Nor should Patsy ever assist in battling any Act Boss, except to act as a Potion Squirrel and fetch red juice from town for the knights. If Patsy does his job efficiently enough, the entire team may rarely ever need to visit town, aside from repairs and purchasing items.
Patsy should never venture off alone, unless it is to retreat to town, because he is quite cowardly.
If Patsy the Player Character exists, Arthur may not hire Patsy the Merc Mule. Patsy, like the knights, is restricted to Minstrels (Rogues w/o bows) for mercs.
Armor
Patsy may use no armor Studded or better.
Boots, Belts, Gloves
Must be cloth/animal hide.
Helms
Patsy must wear ugly Caps at all times, because he is merely a servant. This ugly Cap (not skull cap!) reminds him of his place among the common people.
Shield
Patsy uses small round shields (bags) to block blows.
Weapons
Patsy may use only dagger class weapons, and no throwing weapons (including throwing knives). He is not trusted with weapons of war. The last time he was given one Arthur had to buy new rugs and tapestries for the castle.
Enchantments/Sets/Uniques
Darn near anything is ok, so long as it isn't particularly evil or poisonous.
He may use Find Potion, Find Item, Natural Resistance, Iron Skin, Increased Stamina, Increased Speed, Whirlwind, Double Swing, Frenzy. That's it. Remember, Patsy's no serious fighter. (Note: Dual-wield skills are allowed, though Patsy much prefers using a shield.) Patsy may put 1 point into Leap to be used only during the Castle of Guy de Loimbard Quest.
In a team with Patsy, it may choose for the knights to not use any town service whatsoever (other than restart in town). The knights are much too busy crusading to take time and look at the wares of mere townspeople. Patsy, being non-essential and one of the commonfolk, would be able to browse the wares, take things to be repaired, and buy things for his companions.