Are you, in fact, a pregnant lady who lives in the apartment next door to Superdeath's parents? - Commodore

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[spoilers]Commodore is Darius II of the HRE, now with less excuse.

Case in point, regarding the banter thread:

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Not shown, Mist deciding that running the EP slider on me was more important than, say, 500 beakers towards cavalry or chemistry or whatever. I really am being de-facto hated on. I'm seriously curious as to why Mist decided to throw the game to China, here...or is it just not clear that I am no longer close to winning.
If only you and me and dead people know hex, then only deaf people know hex.

I write RPG adventures, and blog about it, check it out.
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Speaking of winning, first Chinese rifle just appeared. I get tired of being dour all the time, but...okay, discuss amongst yourselves: Seriously, how is this game not Gaspar's to lose? He's got a well-developed core and is about to have about 70% more land than the next closest competitor. He's teching faster than I am, and with Spi that's only getting better. Mist, the next largest empire, has evidently decided to ignore Turkey and focus on an inexplicable grudge match against me, teching Astronomy and running EP slider hardcore...and he slowed me enough with a cataphract assault that I had no chance to capture any of France or China. Lovely, lovely China.

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Here's the ugly ground. The city I was planning on taking was Palaven, letting the front widen but it's at least anchored reasonably well by the hills and peaks to the south. Mist is about to plant a hill city I must destroy, however, if I do not wish to lose Kusari to the extra cultural pressure. Finally, the time for easy conquest of France is represented on the lower right HUD, as musketeers will complicate things massively.

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So, again, how do I win at game here guys?
If only you and me and dead people know hex, then only deaf people know hex.

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So I'm not gonna lie, kind of unpleasant way to start a turn. Dave's making much more gold now, so I think he's getting his musketeers online by the end of or a little after that golden age, and the spy loss plus Sistine means that Chinese murk will only get worse. So glad I'm getting the Hermitage there in Kiki.

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Even worse, Mist is opting to be even more spiteful, running his EP slider another full turn. He's in the ragequit mode. Even more annoying: Positioning here. Um. Unless I'm missing a Great Artist, I fail to see how this will garner any positive results for him at all.

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I'm taking it seriously, for all that. Here's what I've got inside Kusari; it ought to be enough to shift that little annoyance. I'm tempted to try and hold it, pumping in as much culture as possible and letting it flank Bravery, but that's probably not a winning move, honestly.

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Mist is a spiteful little ball of hate, but not a threat to win. Gaspar, however, is winning. Here's us both going to 100%, and he doesn't even have a tech selected unless I'm mistaken. Oy vey. Now this is also with an Oxford Bureaucap, but still...

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Ending turn did yield this little lovely finishing: With Oxford up, I'm doing better, but Nationhood is killing me. Still, rushing rifles is pretty huge for my plans. I also am so happy-starved that the barracks losing their +2 smile is a consideration.

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But also coming in at the end of turn...

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jivejivejive Popped another one! Plus, we have oil in a relatively secure location! Plus, we got a Great Merchant! Plus, Communism is down to a two-turn tech! Plus...well, that's plenty enough happy news. If the Byzantines were playing to win right now, I'd feel like I still have a shot.
If only you and me and dead people know hex, then only deaf people know hex.

I write RPG adventures, and blog about it, check it out.
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Well, that was about as tactically uninteresting as it gets. Three catapults expended to knock down the six defenders, Pinch rifle to clear the top defender (who the catapults weren't damaging all that much), and then Subutai and friends take care of buisiness.

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Save the cats, flawless victory!
If only you and me and dead people know hex, then only deaf people know hex.

I write RPG adventures, and blog about it, check it out.
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Vain Mr. Subutai's photo shoot aside, he was not the fellow to strike the killing blow of the city. I promoted him back in the days when we were dealing with a bevy of cataphracts, so he lacks morale, and needs another kill to get there. Anyway, here's the final setup. I'll withdraw next turn, but although Mist can kill everyone inside his borders, unless he's extremely lucky it will be very painful to do so.

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Of considerably more worry are the Sistine-boosted pinkies to the northeast. Kiki is getting dangerously crushed by the three specialist-pumping cities over the lake. The Hermitage will buy us some time, but frankly, unless Gaspar opts for Scientific Method and slavery soon, we're going to get even more crunched.

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GNP is neck-and-neck with the Monk economy/hybrid China, MFG is far behind China and France in a golden age (gunpowder next turn), and crop yield is just slightly edging out the big Byzantine cities in the lush lands. Demos tell the story, we're doing well but unless something crazy happens we're not pulling ahead.

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I promise the next few updates, I'll focus on the positives, which are very real here in Holy Rome still. But the reason why I'm sound so unrelentingly down is that I fully expect each player to thine own selves shall remain true:

Yuri shall continue mailing it in with his doomed defense.

Dave shall continue actively and energetically applying himself to staying alive. He'll remain friendly towards me unless attacked, but if he is attacked he will do everything in his power to utterly ruin my cookies, writing many, many very high-quality battle reports while he tries to turn it into a slog.

Mist, oddly without Ichabod's play-to-win presence anymore, will continue to fight his Forever War against Dave and especially myself, focusing on tactics while ignoring bigger picture plans.

Finally, Gaspar will continue on his cautious way, not willing to risk it all in one massive attack (wisely) but slowly inching ahead with 70% more land than we have and increasingly strong diversification options as Spiritual comes into its own. His pessimism means he'll probably continue to doubt his victory until his spaceship reaches Alpha Centauri, but slowly and surely his excellent management will produce great results as he nestles secure in his vassal state's protection.
If only you and me and dead people know hex, then only deaf people know hex.

I write RPG adventures, and blog about it, check it out.
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Commodore Wrote:Dave shall continue actively and energetically applying himself to staying alive. He'll remain friendly towards me unless attacked, but if he is attacked he will do everything in his power to utterly ruin my cookies, writing many, many very high-quality battle reports while he tries to turn it into a slog.

I gather we're about to start seeing these high-quality reports on a new front?
EitB 25 - Perpentach
Occasional mapmaker

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Right on. So, Mist opted to clear my offending rifle with a pair of sacrificial muskets, Yuri lost his capital, and Gaspar is looking at another MoM-boosted Golden Age. All-in-all, no shockers.

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Mist covered his victorious cataphract with a rifle, so no vengeance to be had. Oh well, I'll trade a rifle for two muskets and a worker any day, keep on working towards that next GG. I laughed at Gaspar's chariot oggler.

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That name is a response to my own "CNN" observer in the field of the artist formerly known as Turkey, AKA New China. So glad all these buggers are running around on the other end of the world.

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So then, focusing on the positive; let's talk about Great People. The fresh young merchant in Oasis will be joined by a strapping young spy at the end of turn from Communism. This will launch us into a Golden Age, most probably our last. I will run several scientists and a spy to abuse the GPP boost in the golden age, but who we really want is an engineer, which is why the Hagia Sophia.

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The reason? Cooperations aren't banned. Sid's would be wonderful in the culturally pressured east, and a number of the others would be okay, but the biggie would be to snag Mining Inc. That's going to be worth a lot of hammers, and the HRE means costs are reduced 75%. Oh, yeah...it's going to be GE or bust after this golden age's GP.

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Demographics aren't terrible, but they aren't looking great either. They still tell the same story as before, except obviously with even more power. If only the land area demo didn't suck...

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Oh! Right. Working on that.

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I hated to do it, but sadly, I see little other choice right now. I checked on Thessia with a worker and found it with only an archer garrison. So, Morale knight burns it, and now if I hurry we have a great new city location, with clams and winnable wet rice, riverside, and lots of coast. I offered Dave peace, but not for nothing...I have quite the army down south, and I have a need for stone. He accepts peace, these guys are Palaven's new garrison.

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If he rejects it...yeah, they're still Palaven's new garrison. But I'll be capturing Tachunka and boating The Citadel too, at the very least. If Dave wants to stay alive, he'll accept. If he'd rather spit in my eye, that's perfectly fair and let the games begin.

Now let's also take bets on how bold Mr. Noble-in-Gaspar's-absence is feeling, eh? Cry Havoc, let slip the dogs of war.
If only you and me and dead people know hex, then only deaf people know hex.

I write RPG adventures, and blog about it, check it out.
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Commodore Wrote:Now let's also take bets on how bold Mr. Noble-in-Gaspar's-absence is feeling, eh? Cry Havoc, let slip the dogs of war.

I'm quite unplugged at this point, how long is Gaspar gone for? I have Noble pegged as a cautious person, he wouldn't want to tangle in a substitute role... right?

Also, annexing France is likely your best chance to keep up with Gaspar... musketeers or not. Go team Commodore!

<ducks back out before drawing too much attention>
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Ceiliazul Wrote:I'm quite unplugged at this point, how long is Gaspar gone for? I have Noble pegged as a cautious person, he wouldn't want to tangle in a substitute role... right?

Also, annexing France is likely your best chance to keep up with Gaspar... musketeers or not. Go team Commodore!

<ducks back out before drawing too much attention>

Gaspar's in the middle of moving, so who knows how long it'll be, he's not totally out of pocket but he's not playing turns. Noble is actually a very anti-Commodore guy, but he's out of position. I offered peace to Mist, so weirdly enough China could be targeted very soon if I so desired. Might be annexing just a tiny bit of France, might conquer a mass of it...who knows right now.
If only you and me and dead people know hex, then only deaf people know hex.

I write RPG adventures, and blog about it, check it out.
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So as you can see, Dave went with the spit-in-the-eye choice, understandable. As well. I love AI diplo and what it can convey. Unfortunately, "hey I can sell you a caravel for vengeance" doesn't convey so well. As well, Yuri lost the city I would have sold it to anyway.

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Dave has an admirable twelve catapults in position to really bring the pain next turn. Those maces aren't doing much good anyway, so I'm sure he's going to be pouring them into the fight very freely.

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I've been giving some thought to the matter, and I think this is actually a case where standard tactical doctrine might not be valid. Each rifle can kill about 2.5 maces, but with a withering storm of catapults anything below a rifle is pretty screwed. So, let's see how this works. If it fails, eh, easy come easy go.

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Speaking of easy-go, those draftees are a bit...miffed in places. Kusari has a post-HR happy cap of three right now. One without Nationhood. Um. Yeah. Ah well, we're delaying the GA and revolution a bit anyway as Nationhood helps churn out more disposable unstacked rifles.

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No I do not think this is sure to be the best course, but if Dave is going to toss it all at me, Gaspar wins anyway. So yeah. I do wish I had a bit more to menace Tuchanka with, but alas, we can't have everything.

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Indications are that I've been whipping/drafting heavily. Drama was quickly knocked out of the way this turn, now on to Steel. Railroad is the endgame of that little beeline, then we'll have the choice of Combustion or Constitution/Democracy.

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Taking bets now! How much is this one peak going to drop? Good thing I'm at peace with Mist at least now. I doubt he'll try it, but Gaspar and Noble have to at least worry about Byzantines now, although that Pink line is a lot of rifles.

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Doomed? Probably. But better this way than by inches under the Chinese industrial onslaught.
If only you and me and dead people know hex, then only deaf people know hex.

I write RPG adventures, and blog about it, check it out.
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