[SPOILERS] HitAnyKey's Insanity Reigns Again

[HitAnyKey]

So yeah...I'm definitely apparently trying to do my best to screw up what should have been an easy war. As expected, Jowy killed both my axes, so I had to destroy the workers I had captured since there was no way I could get them home.
So now my two new axes & spearman are on the way. At this point, mostly to have something out there and keep him from re-settling the city before I can get a couple more axes built and sent over there. So it'll be while now before I can take his city. And if he gets horses hooked up, or archers made....well, I'll be screwed and I'll have damaged us both beyond repair and it'll essentially be game over for both of us.

[HitAnyKey]

To my loyal lurkers...few as there may be....my sincere apologies for the lack of reports during this time of insane war....
With the basic failure of my rush on Jowy, and the fact that I only have time to take screenshots and post details when I'm home at night...I actually get distracted by my wife (dinner, watching tv, etc) more often than not and don't get around to logging in again to collect my thoughts...especially if I had ended up quickly playing a turn before rushing off to work in the morning.

Anyway, today allows for all of that. Both because it's a weekend (and a holiday weekend at that) and because the dear wife is away for the weekend with a girlfriend of hers. So that leaves me to do whatever I want. And of course yesterday, that entailed 10-hrs straight of starting out playing Dragon Age: Origins on her PS3 (I also have a PS3, but hers has all the downloadable content for that game)....nothing like having a wife that is more of a gamer than you are, who has been urging you to try out playing her favorite game.


Well, back to the task at hand....the attempted conquering of Jowy while probably dooming myself in the process.
First up...the current state of the "empire":

Need to replace the two Axes that Jowy killed after I razed his copper city. So that's what my two cities are doing right now. My Spear is also on it's way east as backup to the two axes I have on Jowy's border, for the eventual time when he gets Chariots. He just finished Hunting this turn, and the only reason to research that at this point is if he has Horses in his borders...which means he'll get them pastured and at least one or two chariots built before I can get enough axes over there to attack him. Which also means this is going to be a LONG DRAWN OUT WAR THAT WILL CRIPPLE ME. LOL


This screenie shows where things are in the east. I forgot to take a screenshot before I moved this turn, but on that forest he has 1 Axe (Str/Shock promos), 1 Axe (Str promo), 1 Warrior (Str promo). I originally was going to move my two axes onto his Mine (to stop him from using it and also destroy it) but I though with his Shock Axe and other backup units, he might have decent odds of killing my units. At least decent enough odds to risk it, and with my luck the RNG would hate me. I probably should have tried to sandbox such an attack, but I really don't know how to do that type of sandbox so had no way to test what the odds would be for his Shock Axe to attack my axe on that hill. So I decided to move away, to see if he follows me at all. If for some strange reason he moves NW across the water after me, I'll move NE across the water back into his borders. If he moves W, I'll have to decide if I feel like moving back E again or if I just stay where I am or if I move W again to meed up with my eventual reinforcements. Or if he doesn't follow me, I might move NE and then E onto the PHF (if he doesn't have anything on that tile by the time I get there). Don't want him going to settle that Copper city again, after all. Anyway, I'm basically going to be bouncing around out there with my axes until my reinforcements arrive....since I really don't know what else to do at this point.


The good news is that a couple turns ago I sent a worker down south to road the Horses of my own I found (after getting AH) and built a Settler to go get them. So next turn I'll have my third city and will be immediately pasturing those horses so I can make my own Chariots. Hopefully I can get one or two out to the field of battle quickly enough to make a difference.


My little workboat....has been exploring WAAAYY out there. He's just found the top of the map and is just going to keep going until someone eventually decides to declare war on the little guy and destroy him.



The bad news of this whole situation....is that I'm really sucking when it comes to everything...except being up there in power. I was #1 or #2 for the longest time. Only just recently fell to #4.


There won't really be a whole lot to report for the next few turns, unless something weird happens with my axes out east. I'm going to be finishing my current axes, possibly starting more, and waiting for my horses to come online.
Oh, also forgot to point out that as you can see I get Sailing next turn. So after that axe finishes in Asylum, I'll be making a Galley. The original purpose of that was to settle the island to the west if it, but I'm thinking that Galley is going to go south to hopefully pick up units as I finish them, and sail them over to Jowy's capital. That might be what could help me, if I can get a Spear & Chariot onto the Galley. And attack him from behind.

[HitAnyKey]

It's been awhile since I've given an update, so figured I'd give a quick update on how much I've screwed myself in this game. I don't see any way to really recover, so I'm just going to keep at doing what I'm doing until someone else sweeps in and destroys me.

This is the way things look over in Jowy's lands. I only just this turn got all my offensive military to the same position:

Not a bad looking stack, huh?

Just a weeee little problem though....

Yup, I have no way to do anything about his city until I have Catapults, Swords, and just about anything else that I don't have right now and won't have for a very long time. So all I can do right now is rampage through his lands, destroy his improvements to get some gold, and try to do something to work towards eventually capturing his city.

Towards that end....


In 3 turns, I'll get a city settled on that island to my west. It's a nice piece of property, has a Hut on it that will be in the city borders when I settle it, will give me another city to help lessen the military cost, and will also give me additional trade routes. With any luck, this will actually help me a little. Though It's still too little, too late, I'm sure.

[HitAnyKey]

So I'm apparently a complete idiot, and completely forgot/didn't realize that Chariots don't get their 100% bonus towards Axemen when they are defending. For some reason I thought they did, and have now lost 2 Axemen because of this. My game is basically over now. I have no way to take this city, I've destroyed my economy, and have no hopes of keeping up with anyone in this game. I'll obviously keep playing onward until I'm dead, but it's only a matter of time. This will go down in history as one of the worst rush attempts around.

[Ceiliazul]

do you think jowy will attack you?

[HitAnyKey]

He can't attack me. He only has the one city with 2 Axes, 4 Archers, 2 Warriors in it. I've cut him off from all resources and as of next turn will have pillaged all his improvements. He also currently only has one worker left.
I'm not scared of Jowy at all. Once I get Catapults I'll be able to go back and fight him, but for now I can't break those defenses...probably not even with Swordsmen (I'll find out where my Iron is, if I have any, next turn).

It's everyone else I'm scared of. Once any one of my neighbors decide it's time to expand across the water, I'm a pretty easy target.

Sadly, if I had realized the two Chariots I made were not going to provide the defense for my axemen against his axemen, I would not have made them to send over there. I would have sent over a couple Skirmishers first. I'll be making a few of those next, but it's just too late now. And there's still a good chance he'll kill another unit or two of mine before I can get them back around to my side of his city. I just needed to slow his re-growth by destroying his improvements with my chariots.

[HitAnyKey]

In the off-chance I can't play my turn before the timer runs out (will be travelling tonight after work), Parkin my password is HAK.
Not a whole lot going on....
Units east of Jowy stay fortified. The Galley in the south will pick up the Skirmisher from the city down there, head over to where the units are fortified. I'll be back before it reaches there. The scout/chariot I just dropped off on the island will explore. The workboat will continue exploring. The workers will do something...whatever you think is logical. I think they can do one more turn of chopping the forests they are on (chop then cancel) such that I'm going to wait to complete the chops until after I have Math.
I think that's about it for anything that might need a decision.
Oh the other Chariot will go destroy the mine from Jowy's old city.

[HitAnyKey]

Can someone tell me who is the leader of The Funpire? They are the green colored Civ to my NW. I need to open a diplo screen to request Open Borders, but I can't see them on the scoreboard because it is too tall for my screen. And the Foreign Relations screen doesn't display colors or nation names.
I really wish this fix would get put in place. It's making it very difficult for me to play the game.
I'd rather not have to declare war on yet another civ, just to get my exploring galley passage through.

[Commodore]

GermanJojo, Shaka

[Lord Parkin]

Turn 108

Continued with Catapult builds as requested. Obviously the empire isn't in great shape, main problem is low happiness. Optimized a few tiles - you really should be whipping even at this low happy cap, it's much more efficient than working forests for hammers.

Demographics.