Gamebooks (Choose Your Own Adventure Style)

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

You Say Which Way:  Deadline Delivery Alternate Endings Part 2


Staying on the shotgun cabbage woman's boat in CHOICE #6 gives me the first bad ending.


"In the speedboat are two pirates-a bald man with a skull tattoo covering his head, and a woman with a Mohawk haircut.  Both wear necklaces of human teeth.  'Lunch!' they roar, grinning at you.  They're not talking about the cabbages.  The man leaps onto the cabbage boat, giggling and waving ahuge machete.  You scream.  The last thing you ever see is that machete, glinting in the sun as it whooshes down towards you".


Alternate Ending Death Count:  1


Remember the two pirates who passed by the Rusty Rhino shortly after CHOICE #1?  They're back in this alternate timeline!

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

You Say Which Way:  Deadline Delivery Alternate Endings Part 3


Picking the "decide later" route in CHOICE #7 leads to me delivering a package to 157 Nori Road, near Deadline Delivery.  It's a "small heavy box". 


Carrying the box out of the clinic draws the attention of a "scary-looking woman with a Mohawk haircut and a necklace of teeth" holding a baby.  Could she be one of the Kannibal Krew pirates that killed me in the first bad ending? 


The road is blocked by the rubble from the same building that led to CHOICE #2.  There are "giant rescue robots" cleaning up the area, along with "police hovercraft" and "news drones".


The hot dog sign near the hidden tunnel is tilted differently, suggesting that someone else passed through.  Apparently Big Pig's soldiers closed the entrance, if I can believe the "old man with the dreadlocked beard" who's part of the Kannibal Krew.  My suspicions about the woman with the tooth necklace are correct.  CHOICE #8 is to run away, or to hitch a ride with the Kannibal Krew.


Running from the Kannibal Krew leads me to a dead-end ladder with a "thirty-foot drop onto concrete".  Except there's also a window too small for the pirates to fit through.  All my money is gone when something rips.  Can't go back through Big Pig's Wall without any coins.


Our 2nd bad ending is inconclusive, but not a death.


"In what's left of the twilight, you find a hidey-hole between a collapsed wall and a sheet of rusty corrugated iron.  Your dinner is the last crumbs from the meatloaf plastic bag in your pocket.  You hug your knees to stay warm, and try to sleep, hoping something nasty won't find you in the middle of the night, hoping that tomorrow will be better".

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

You Say Which Way:  Deadline Delivery Alternate Endings Part 4


Let's not trust the shotgun cabbage woman in CHOICE #5!


She fires her shotgun in my direction right after I take cover behind a brick wall.  The old woman is talking to the 2 Kannibal Krew pirates, which I find out by taking a peek from around the wall.  She notices me and fires the shotgun again.  She misses, but now I have the pirates' attention.  Running towards an open door is useless, since someone locks it before I get there.  "Can't blame them-everyone's scared of the Kannibal Crew".


There's a pathway leading towards some mud that would strand the Kannibal Krew boat, but there are also Piranha pirates too.  I can overhear them saying this:  "Little kids sell for fifty bucks at the moment-more if they're cute", along with their plans for capturing an ironclad.  CHOICE #9 is to either "make a run for the bridge" or sit around and wait for the pirates to fight it out.


The latter was the more interesting option.  But there were more Piranhas than Kannibal Krew, so my pursuers are running around near where I am.  I jump down the stairs and start limping towards an "ancient fridge half-covered in broken bricks".  The cabbage boat sails away.  The Kannibal Krew's speedboat doesn't start, and one of the Piranhas is pulled underwater. 


I fall into the water, and an octopus takes my backpack away.  "The octopus somehow grows two brown arms and a body with green webbed feet."  No, it's not actually an octopus, but a "froggy" from urban legends.  She's wearing an octopus mask, probably to confuse people.  The other froggies are pulling pirates underwater:  "The Mohawked woman is shrieking and splashing somewhere in the water.  There's no sign of the skull-faced man.  Two Piranhas have ropes lassoed around their bodies and are being slowly pulled into the water. . ."


The froggy with the octopus mask drags me through the water to 390 Brine Street to deliver the package.  The Internet still exists in this future, as indicated by the following line:  "The woman shows you a tablet screen displaying the Deadline Delivery web site, and presses the green Delivery Received icon".


The octopus mask girl takes me to what remains of an indoor swimming pool:  "Why people back then needed a special room just for swimming, you don't know".  The froggies turn out to be regular humans with clothes made from various recycled materials, like plastic bags and electrical cables.  Fungus is the girl's name, and their ruler is Queen Verdigris.  (Yes, the player character knows what verdigris is, and thinks it's a strange choice for a name.)  The froggies decide I know too much, and sentence me to Crocodile Doom in the old swimming pool.


CHOICE #10 is to dash for a hole in the wall, or to help a froggy kid.  Let's choose the 2nd option and find out.


The froggy kid is Fungus's brother Bucket.  Queen Verdigris declares me to be a friend of the froggies and offers CHOICE #11:  Live as a froggy, or remain a courier for Deadline Delivery.


Picking the former leads to two career options for CHOICE #12:  Work at a sewage treatment plant, or at a fishery?


Captain Tiger Lily doesn't like my questions much, particularly about why she left the over-city to become a froggy.  My character is a lousy fisher.  Dolphins lure out the fish, but I pull on the incorrect rope and feed them more than Captain Tiger Lily intended when fish fall out of the net. 


Our next ending is inconclusive, but seemingly positive.  I become more competent at fishing, but both Captain Tiger Lily and I want adventure.  So we sail out on a ship called the Seahorse and look for a legendary paradise island called Oasis.  Seahorses are apparently extinct, since they're called an "olden-days animal".


"A month later, you and Tiger Lily and the rest of the crew board the Seahorse, watched by nearly every froggy in the city.  Bucket's crying because he wanted to come on the voyage too.  You wave goodbye to everyone, knowing you'll miss them, wondering if you'll ever see them again.  Or the city.  'Cast off.  Make sail' orders Tiger Lily.  'Aye captain'.  Blinking back tears, you turn to face the oncoming sea, and adventure".

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

You Say Which Way:  Deadline Delivery Alternate Endings Part 5


The sewage treatment career option in CHOICE #12 is not as bad as you might think.  I get used to the smell, and start recycling sludge into "All-Natural Organic Fertilizer".  Good to know that marketing from the early 21st century survives into. . .whenever this book is set.  Other materials are recycled too, such as plastic.  One time, I find a valuable necklace that someone from the over-city offered a reward for returning.  My character becomes an entrepreneur in this ending:


"Why don't we start a froggy courier business?  We know a million routes around the city that dry-skins don't, and I reckon we could deliver stuff faster than anyone else.  We'd make money, and. . .well, people might start treating froggies better if they knew we weren't monsters, just ordinary people making an honest living".

[sunrise089]

Re: Saturn story: ‘I noticed the dolphin had the insignia of my commanding officer, so of course I fired the speargun.’ I lol’d.

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

Re: Saturn story: ‘I noticed the dolphin had the insignia of my commanding officer, so of course I fired the speargun.’ I lol’d.

Seeing Drill Sergeant Flipper with teeth bared and a UN tattoo is worth the $5 price of admission.  I'd post the image, but there doesn't seem to be a way to copy illustrations in Kindle books.  Google Images doesn't have the picture either.

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

You Say Which Way:  Deadline Delivery Alternate Endings Part 6


Let's join the Rusty Rhino crew in CHOICE #4 instead of taking the CANONICAL ENDING by remaining a courier!


The most relevant quote is here:


"But word quickly spreads through the under-city about how Captain Abdu's crew outsmarted the Piranha gang and saved Big Pig's territory from invasion.  An hour later, Big Pig sends out his best mechanics and boat builders to rescue the Rhino.  A few weeks later, the boat's been fully repaired.  Its new bow is painted with an angry pig logo, signaling to everyone that the boat gets free passage through Big Pig's Tollgates.  Forever."


The Rusty Rhino ships "rat skins, dried plankton, and jellied eels".  Captain Abdu trains me to be a sailor.  Overall, a positive ending, though Big Pig might demand a special favor in the future.


Deadline Delivery's generic epilogue text now mentions that there's a pirate gang called the Shadows.  At least one ending will let me see the over-city too.

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

You Say Which Way:  Deadline Delivery Alternate Endings Part 7


I tried correcting the CHOICE #s for some of the earlier entries, since I think one of them was used twice accidentally.


Anyway, CHOICE #3 is pointless.  Even if you defend yourself with the spear, you still get conked on the head as if you chose to jump off the boat.


Leaving the Rusty Rhino in CHOICE #2 gets me to 390 Brine Street quickly.  "A man in a white coat takes the package, scribbles an electronic signature on a data tablet, then walks away, arguing on his phone the whole time and barely looking at you".  Cell phones still seem to exist in this future, along with the Internet.  But chances are only the wealthy have them.  Video games are around too:  Miss Betty at Deadline Delivery loves playing "Bouncy Bunnies".


I deliver the package, but soon run into trouble!  "Too late, you realize they're not shadows but Shadows, the local pirate gang who dress in black from head to toe".  They give me another bonkus of the conkus and steal my money and shoes. 


A boy from the over-city appears and says that the Shadows are ninjas instead of pirates.  "Pirates don't dress like that.  Pirates wear eye patches and stripy T-shirts and old-timey captain hats.  And they have cutlasses and flintlock pistols.  And peg legs.  And parrots on their shoulders.  Well, not all at once, I suppose.  And they say 'Arrrrrr!' and bury secret treasure and then find it again".


My character isn't too fond of this kid, but is intrigued by his offer to pay for a train ticket to the over-city.  This leads to CHOICE #13:  Go with him to the over-city, or stay in the under-city?



I decide to go with him.  It's a long climb through a "creaking girder", and a "slippery concrete wall".  I tell him my name is "Rhino" because I'm suspicious of him.  The boy's name is Albert, and he has a phone in his little finger.  He got it as a birthday present because he kept losing more conventional cell phones.


The over-city is as shiny as expected, and has an "entire wall showing a giant video ad for deodorant" and a "lacy golden bridge that plays tinkly notes with your every step".  Ivory Tower extends to the over-city.  To prevent under-city inhabitants from going to the higher levels, most of the stairwells had been blocked.  


CHOICE #14 is to try to go into Ivory Tower, or flee from the police robot approaching me.


Albert gives me some new shoes before he leaves, saying he has "dozens". 


The doorman for the Ivory Tower was a former under-city inhabitant, and knows Miss Betty from Deadline Delivery.  We play along for the security cameras to avoid trouble.  Not much of an ending for this path:


"The elevator doesn't even look like an elevator from out here-there are no control buttons, just two stainless steel panels that you know are really its doors.  So, it's a one-way elevator-sneaky.  Yes, this really is Level 8-there's the tattoo parlor at the other end of the corridor, and next to it, Deadline Delivery.  Miss Betty scowls at you, as usual.  But she pays you the ten-dollar delivery fee, as promised.  The steel door squeaks and starts to close, and you hurry out.  Miss Betty doesn't say goodbye.  She never does".

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

You Say Which Way:  Deadline Delivery Alternate Endings Part 8


Let's "Run from the Police Robot" in CHOICE #14!


Well, the robot is faster than I am.  It grabs me with with many hands and says "You are unauthorized".  It throws me in a "large cage labeled Trash" along with my new shoes wrapped in a plastic bag.  It does have the courtesy to say "Please hold your breath.  Have a nice day". 


Some people are talking about finding pizza and apple cores in the trash, though they're not happy I'm still alive, as I'm worth $10 dead. 


"Back at Deadline Delivery, Miss Betty scowls at you, as usual.  She pays you the ten-dollar delivery fee, as promised, but only after deducting two dollars as a Wet Uniform fee for your cap.  So unfair.  You scowl back at her silently.  The steel door squeaks and starts to close, and you hurry out.  Miss Betty doesn't say goodbye.  She never does".


Pretty much the same as the previous ending, except I get cheated out of part of my pay.  It's still "the best day you've had in months", according to the epilogue text.

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

You Say Which Way:  Deadline Delivery Alternate Endings Part 9


Remaining in the under-city after CHOICE #13 leads to this:  "Twenty minutes later, you've stubbed your toes three times, trodden in dog poop, come within an inch of stepping on a rusty nail, and been sniffed by a hungry-looking cat".


I see the Rusty Rhino again, but I see someone else wearing Captain Abdu's top hat.  He's wearing the Piranha gang uniform, so the hijacking storyline from CHOICE #3's timeline still occurs. 



CHOICE #15 is either to warn the Tollgate soldiers that the Rusty Rhino is trying to ram the Wall, or ignore everyone, believing they can fend for themselves.


I barely outrun the Rusty Rhino, and fall down in the process.  The people on the street start throwing objects at the Rusty Rhino.  This pays off when one of the Piranhas tries to shoot me with a pistol, but fails to pull the trigger when a brick hits him.  The Tollgate releases "five enormous spikes", damaging the Rusty Rhino.  ". . .with a shriek like a dying dinosaur, it collides with the spikes, gouging long holes in its side".


The Piranhas are handcuffed.  As a reward, Big Pig repairs the Rusty Rhino and paints his pig logo on the bow, just like another ending.


My ending is different:


"Somehow Big Pig hears about you too, and orders you to have an angry pig logo tattooed on your hand-that gives you free passage through the Tollgates too.  You secretly hate the tattoo, but hey, no more Tollgate fees ever?-that sounds great.  Life's definitely improving".


So I'm a local hero for warning Big Pig about the Piranhas, similar to the CANONICAL ENDING.  Except in the official ending, I don't have a pig tattoo.