Gamebooks (Choose Your Own Adventure Style)

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

Ultimate Ending:  Treasures of the Forgotten City Alternate Endings Part 25


Visiting the side road on the right in CHOICE #45 makes the party look at artwork at the bottom of what was once a pool.  A woman is drawn "garbed in a starkly-colored dress of alternating red and black, and menaced by a snarling dog".  Near some columns close to Queen's Tower, a monitor lizard "maybe twice the size of a Komodo Dragon" is smelling the air.  CHOICE #51 is to fight the lizard with the hatchet on Page 77, hide behind stones on Page 56, or pull Waif and run on Page 111.


Fleeing doesn't even acknowledge that the monitor lizard existed, as it goes straight to CHOICE #47 with the stone and jade staircases.  Hiding also unlocks CHOICE #47, though now there's a scene where the lizard mistakes the stones for its eggs and leaves.


Attacking the lizard with the hatchet isn't fatal, but is still a failure.


"The lizard looks slow, and your axe is sharp.  What could possibly go wrong?  As the creature saunters in you wind back take your best swing [sic].  THWACK!  The axe crashes into the hide of the lizard's head exactly where you were aiming.  But its skin is too thick, its skull too hard.  Rather than penetrate the tough reptilian hide, the weapon is jarred from your fingers and goes sailing through the air!


Waif is having no better luck.  The monster takes little notice of his torch at all.  It pushes through you both, heading straight past on its way to the smooth white stones directly behind you.  It opens its mouth to strike. . .and misses!


You glance back.  The lizard has one of the stones in its mouth.  It starts turning back in the direction it came from.  'Eggs!' Waif cries in realization.  'The quakes probably woke it from its nest, and now it thinks these things are its eggs!'  Whew.  What a relief.  You lower your axe when all of a sudden. . .'AARRGHH!'


With a sickening crunch the creature accidentally steps on your foot!  It stomps away with the 'egg' in its mouth, but by then the damage is already done.  Your foot feels like a jigsaw puzzle with half the pieces missing.  After avoiding the last swish of the monster's tail, Waif comes running to your aid.  'We. . .I. . .Oh'.  One look at your foot is all it takes.  'Donovan, I'm. . .I'm sorry.'


The journey from Atraharsis will be painfully long.  The walk to a hospital even longer.  In time your foot will heal.  Probably.  Still, it doesn't change the fact that right now this happens to be THE END".


Banjo and Kazooie became podiatrists after they left the platformer business, and saved DONOVAN YOUNG's foot by stuffing it with Jiggies.



Results So Far


1 Good Endings

15 Deaths

6 Bad Non-Death Endings

1 Neutral Endings

2 Inconclusive Endings

1 ULTIMATE ENDING

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

Ultimate Ending:  Treasures of the Forgotten City Finale


Going north to check out the movement in the shadows in CHOICE #40 unlocks CHOICE #52, where the player can either search around the remnants of an ancient tent on Page 139, or keep moving on Page 85.  It's possible that Sullivan may encounter the party if they stay.


But as usual with Sullivan, it's an empty threat.  Looking around gets the party some pearls, another useless minor treasure.  There really should have been a way to trade or sell some of these items.  You end up at Page 85 no matter what.


Waif and DONOVAN YOUNG look around some caves in the cliffs until they find Murdoch's pack:  "It's emblazoned with an insignia that matches the one on your journal".  Their celebration is interrupted by "the stare of the cheetah's yellow eyes".  This seemed about as wrong as the meerkats in Lost in Lion Country, until I learned that cheetahs once lived in the Arabian Peninsula.


CHOICE #53 is to fight the cheetah with the torch on Page 42, throw water at the cheetah and pray it didn't come from the Isle of Swimming Cats on Page 15, or head into the cave on Page 95.


Water gets you a mulligan at CHOICE #53 as your feeble canteen shaking does nothing.  Fire type moves are super-effective and scare the cheetah off.  Two missing pages of Murdoch's journal are found, which are crossed out drawings of the HAWK and the SNAKE from the hexagon room puzzle.  The player then advances to CHOICE #51 and the monitor lizard on the way to the EMERALD.


And entering a dead end cave. . .does not kill you.  Instead, the player character throws Murdoch's pack at the cheetah's head, buying enough time to escape.  On to CHOICE #51.  Atraharsi cheetahs are harmless.


According to my notes, there's only one path left, and that's the EMERALD puzzle after CHOICE #17.  The CHOICE #46 constellation markings come into play here, since you have to turn to which page corresponds to the missing stars of the "Serpent".  This is 24, which leads to CHOICE #19.


Without the clue, you have to play Let's Make a Deal with the left hallway on Page 155, the right hallway on Page 68, or the center hallway on Page 149.  Left is the "get another chance" option as a stone block falls in the way.  The center hallway is the best option apart from solving the puzzle, and goes to CHOICE #19.  Right goes to our last ending!


"You've no idea which gemstones to pry from the constellation.  Rather than chance being wrong, you walk to the other end of the room.  'Pick an exit', you tell Waif.  It seems like a good idea.  So far your friend hasn't steered you wrong.  Waif peers into each of the three openings with the torch.  'They all look the same', he shrugs.  'Let's go right'.


A minute later you're pretty far down the long corridor when it abruptly dead-ends.  'Hmm. . .' Waif says.  'Maybe if we-' he stops.  'Wait, did you just hear a click?'  'No.  Nothing.'  BOOM!


A solid block of granite explodes from the ceiling behind you, neatly sealing the corridor.  It's big and thick and totally impenetrable.  It must way several dozen tons.  You wait, half expecting another door to open. . .but nothing more happens.  You're boxed in, surrounded by stone on all four sides.  There's nothing to look at.  Nothing to see.  And they'll be even less, you're afraid, when Waif's torch finally goes out.


'Maybe someone will come', Waif offers.  'Sullivan's crew, or perhaps someone else.  Maybe if we shouted really loud. . .'  Fear grips you in the darkness.  It's an awful lot of 'maybes'.  All you can do is cross your fingers and hope for the best.  But for now at least, this is THE END".


In this Inconclusive Ending, they don't even have a Cask of Amontillado to pass the time.


The first Ultimate Ending book is blander than some later entries.  Waif is boring compared to the joyfully suicidal Finnegan or YON who changes personality based on which orb you pick.  And the setting is a "generic ancient city", instead of the more imaginative Tower of Never There.


Which book does the Realms Beyond audience want to see?  Another Ultimate Ending?  Everyone's favorite New Zealand series You Say Which Way?  A nonsensical RA Montgomery Choose Your Own Adventure?  Time Machine?  Can You Survive [Insert Apocalyptic Disaster?]  Or perhaps the new Choose Your Own Way series by Paul Moxham?


I'd like to do another bonkers Spanish book, but there don't seem to be many of those available to me.




Final Results


1 Good Endings

15 Deaths

6 Bad Non-Death Endings

1 Neutral Endings

3 Inconclusive Endings

1 ULTIMATE ENDING

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

Ultimate Ending:  Treasures of the Forgotten City Score and Notes


The unofficial score for this Let's Play is 5/27.  Then again, I'm the only person playing these books for the Internet.  Some of the first page Google results for Ultimate Ending seem to be for this thread. . .


PENALTY:  First ending is spider bite DEATH.


PENALTY:  Do I have to watch Bubsy as punishment for not remembering the "NINE LIVES" clue to the hexagon room?


The Microsoft Word map for the CHOICEs looks like this:



 
 
CHOICE #1, page 10

-Turn key clockwise, page 47-50:  Go to CHOICE #2 (CLEAR)
-Turn key counter-clockwise, page 153, 47-50:  Go to CHOICE #2 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #2, page 50

-Grand Gate, page 109, 78:  Go to CHOICE #3 (CLEAR)
-Look for East Gate, page 36:  Go to CHOICE #38 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #3, page 78


-Open area, page 112:  Go to CHOICE #4 (CLEAR)
-Crumbling palace, page 69:  Go to CHOICE #32 (CLEAR)
 


CHOICE #4, page 112

-Statue’s direction, page 40:  Go to CHOICE #5 (CLEAR)
-Search oasis, page 84:  Go to CHOICE #6 (CLEAR, get “amethyst”?)
-Continue onward, page 102:  Go to CHOICE #6 (CLEAR)
 


CHOICE #5, page 40

-Search bones, page 31, 102:  Go to CHOICE #6 (CLEAR, see horse symbol)
-Back out of alley, page 102:  Go to CHOICE #6 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #6, page 102

-Run from jackals, page 57:  Go to CHOICE #7 (CLEAR)
-Make a stand, page 11, 118:  Go to CHOICE #8 (CLEAR)
-Hide from jackals, page 87, 57:  Go to CHOICE #7 (CLEAR)
 


CHOICE #7, page 57

-Roll 1-2, 3 or 5, page 118:  Go to CHOICE #8 (CLEAR)
-Roll 4 or 6, page 38:  BAD ENDING (CLEAR, Waif bitten by jackals, have to abandon adventure)
 

CHOICE #8, page 118

-Search library, page 30:  Go to CHOICE #9 (CLEAR)
-Look elsewhere, page 124-125:  Go to CHOICE #10 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #9, page 30

-Roll 10 or more 2d6, page 76:  DEATH (CLEAR, asp bite)
-Roll 9 or less 2d6, page 94, 124-125:  Go to CHOICE #10 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #10, page 125

-Left, page 103, 129:  Go to CHOICE #24 (CLEAR)
-Right, page 18:  Go to CHOICE #11 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #11, page 18

-Go into Ziggurat hole, page 114, 25:  Go to CHOICE #12 (CLEAR)
-Go up last few steps, page 73:  Go to CHOICE #21 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #12, page 25

-East lever, page 120, 135:  Go to CHOICE #14 (CLEAR, get RUBY)
-West lever, page 148:  Go to CHOICE #13 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #13, page 148


-Roll 1 or 6, page 108:  DEATH (CLEAR, spiders bite Waif and you)
-Roll 2-5, page 70, 120, 135:  Go to CHOICE #14 (CLEAR, get RUBY)
 

CHOICE #14, page 135


-North, page 65:  Go to CHOICE #15 (CLEAR)
-South, page 81:  Go to CHOICE #22 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #15, page 65

-Filthy rich, page 22:  DEATH (CLEAR, underground river drowns you)
-Ignore the jewel, page 89:  Go to CHOICE #16 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #16, page 89

-Black and blue levers, page 121:  DEATH (CLEAR, water floods into control room)
-Gold and red levers, page 28, 44:  Go to CHOICE #17 (CLEAR)
-Abandon levers, page 44:  Go to CHOICE #17 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #17, page 44

-RUBY, page 66:  Go to CHOICE #18 (CLEAR)
-SAPPHIRE, page 92:  Go to CHOICE #29 (CLEAR)
-EMERALD, page 58-59:  Go to CHOICE #54 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #18, page 66

-Key item, page 72, 142:  Go to CHOICE #19 (CLEAR)
-Roll ODD on 2d6, page 144, 142:  Go to CHOICE #19 (CLEAR)
-Roll EVEN on 2d6, page 45:  DEATH (CLEAR, fall into water)
 

CHOICE #19, page 142

-SERPENT, page 117:  Go to CHOICE #19 (CLEAR)
-DOG, page 146:  INCONCLUSIVE ENDING (CLEAR, don’t know if quarry exits still exist)
-CROWN, page 99:  DEATH (CLEAR, throne room with spores)
-HORSE, page 20:  Go to CHOICE #19 (CLEAR)
-CAT, page 156:  Go to CHOICE #20 (CLEAR)
-HAWK, page 160-161:  NEUTRAL ENDING (CLEAR, forced out of city as it sinks, don’t get much treasure)
 


CHOICE #20, page 159

-Man’s greatest treasure, page 96, 162-164:  ULTIMATE ENDING (CLEAR, get scrolls, Atraharsis sinks, recover star jewel)
-Other treasure, page 165:  GOOD ENDING (CLEAR, get some treasure, but not as much as ULTIMATE ENDING)
 

CHOICE #21, page 73

-2 HEADS, page 126:  BAD ENDING (CLEAR, break leg in fall)
-2 TAILS, page 62, 25:  Go to CHOICE #12 (CLEAR)
-1 HEADS, 1 TAILS, page 12, 114, 25:  Go to CHOICE #12 (CLEAR)
 


CHOICE #22, page 81

-Blackness, page 154:  Go to CHOICE #23 (CLEAR)
-Darkness, page 154:  Go to CHOICE #23 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #23, page 154

-Use item against slug, page 52, 44:  Go to CHOICE #17 (CLEAR)
-Roll 7 or lower 2d12, page 35, 44:  Go to CHOICE #17 (CLEAR)
-Roll 8 or higher 2d12, page 168:  DEATH (CLEAR, slug slams you)
 


CHOICE #24, page 129

-Red lens, page 26, 116:  Go to CHOICE #27 (CLEAR, get SAPPHIRE)
-Yellow lens, page 37:  Go to CHOICE #25 (CLEAR)
-Green lens, page 74:  Go to CHOICE #26 (CLEAR)
 


CHOICE #25, page 37


-Roll 5 or more 1d6, page 54:  Go to CHOICE #24 (CLEAR)
-Roll 1-4, page 37:  DEATH (CLEAR, diamond dust cuts up eyes, probably breathes it in too)
 

CHOICE #26, page 74

-HEADS, page 29:  DEATH (CLEAR, scorpion stings Waif, trapped in lens room forever)
-TAILS, page 138:  Go to CHOICE #24 (CLEAR)
-“If you drop the coin, hang your head in shame and flip it until you do catch it!”
 

CHOICE #27, page 116

-Left, page 51, 152:  Go to CHOICE #28 (CLEAR)
-Right, page 119:  Go to CHOICE #30 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #28, page 152


-White, page 170:  DEATH? (CLEAR, room fills with sand)
-Black, page 61, 44:  Go to CHOICE #17 (CLEAR)
-Red, page 113, 44:  Go to CHOICE #17 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #29, page 92

-Put out braziers, page 46:  DEATH (CLEAR, ceiling crushes you)
-Pour water into altar, page 60:  Go to CHOICE #29 (CLEAR)
-Scoop sand into altar, page 151, 142:  Go to CHOICE #19 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #30, page 119

-Inspect moldy sacks, page 98:  Go to CHOICE #31 (CLEAR)
-Ignore sacks, page 152:  Go to CHOICE #28 (CLEAR)
 


CHOICE #31, page 98

-Burn spiders off Waif with torch, page 83:  INCONCLUSIVE ENDING (CLEAR, possibility of escaping and selling SAPPHIRE, but not certain)
-Burn nest with torch, page 130, 152:  Go to CHOICE #28 (CLEAR)
 


CHOICE #32, page 69

-Search palace, page 132, 55:  Go to CHOICE #33 (CLEAR)
-Go back to street, page 55:  Go to CHOICE #33 (CLEAR)
 


CHOICE #33, page 55

-Pitch black tunnel, page 110, 13:  Go to CHOICE #34 (CLEAR)
-Listen to Waif and stay still, page 75, 13:  Go to CHOICE #34 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #34, page 13


-Topple 3rd tower, page 128:  Go to CHOICE #35 (CLEAR)
-Leave it alone, page 41:  Go to CHOICE #36 (CLEAR)
 


CHOICE #35, page 128

-2 HEADS, page 80:  BAD ENDING (CLEAR, Waif is wounded when tower falls on him)
-At least 1 TAILS, page 32, 41:  Go to CHOICE #36 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #36, page 41

-Sneak up on figure, page 16:  Go to CHOICE #37 (CLEAR)
-Call to figure, page 101:  Go to CHOICE #37 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #37, page 101

-East, page 103, 129:  Go to CHOICE #24 (CLEAR)
-West, page 124-125:  Go to CHOICE #10 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #38, page 36

-Waif’s shortcut, page 134:  Go to CHOICE #39 (CLEAR)
-Road to East Gate, page 133:  Go to CHOICE #40 (CLEAR)
 


CHOICE #39, page 134

-Grab Waif, page 141:  BAD ENDING (CLEAR, Waif buried under sands)
-Explore other options, page 64, 133:  Go to CHOICE #40 (CLEAR)
 


CHOICE #40, page 133

-North to movement in shadows, page 90:  Go to CHOICE #52 (CLEAR)
-West to hole/well, page 82:  Go to CHOICE #44 (CLEAR)
-South to avenue, page 167:  Go to CHOICE #41 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #41, page 167

-Roll 1-2 1d6, page 63, 105-107:  Go to CHOICE #42 (CLEAR, get SALT)
-Roll 3 1d6, page 137:  DEATH (CLEAR, even writers disbelieve bad luck)
-Roll 4-6 1d6, page 115, 105-107:  Go to CHOICE #42 (CLEAR, get SALT)
 

CHOICE #42, page 107

-Fight ants, page 140:  Go to CHOICE #43 (CLEAR)
-Roll 3, 5, 7, or 9 on 2d6, page 88:  BAD ENDING (CLEAR, Waif bitten by red ants)
-Roll any other number 2d6, page 150:  Go to CHOICE #43 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #43, page 140, 150

-East, page 13:  Go to CHOICE #34 (CLEAR)
-West, page 82:  Go to CHOICE #44 (CLEAR)
 


CHOICE #44, page 82

-Make a wish, page 17, 33:  Go to CHOICE #45 (CLEAR, see owl eating snake eating rodent clue)
-Spooked, page 33:  Go to CHOICE #45 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #45, page 33

-Mausoleum, page 86:  Go to CHOICE #45 (CLEAR, BEWARE OF FALSE KINGS clue)
-Continue on avenue, page 43:  Go to CHOICE #46 (CLEAR)
-Side road to right, page 97, 145:  Go to CHOICE #51 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #46, page 43

-Check out markings, page 27, 21, 111:  Go to CHOICE #47 (CLEAR)
-Hurry through square, page 91:  Go to CHOICE #50 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #47, page 111

-Stone stairs, page 147:  Go to CHOICE #48 (CLEAR)
-Jade stairs, page 71, 147:  Go to CHOICE #48 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #48, page 147


-ODD 2d6, page 79:  DEATH (CLEAR, poisoned needle puzzle box)
-EVEN 2d6, page 23, 122:  Go to CHOICE #49 (CLEAR, get 2 gold rings)
-Put box in rucksack, page 122:  Go to CHOICE #49 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #49, page 123

-Answer to puzzle, page 34, 116:  Go to CHOICE #27 (CLEAR, get EMERALD)
-BOTH HEADS, page 100:  DEATH (CLEAR, fall out of Queen’s Tower as it collapses)
-BOTH TAILS, page 136, 116:  Go to CHOICE #27 (CLEAR, get EMERALD)
-HEADS and TAILS, page 169, 131, 18:  Go to CHOICE #11 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #50, page 91

-2 HEADS, page 127, 21, 111:  Go to CHOICE #47 (CLEAR)
-2 TAILS, page 39:  DEATH (CLEAR, fall into chasm)
-HEADS and TAILS, page 104, 21, 111:  Go to CHOICE #47 (CLEAR)
 

CHOICE #51, page 145

-Hatchet vs. lizard, page 77:  BAD ENDING (CLEAR, foot stomped on by lizard)
-Hide behind stones, page 56, 111:  Go to CHOICE #47 (CLEAR)
-Yank Waif away and run, page 111:  Go to CHOICE #47 (CLEAR)
 


CHOICE #52, page 90

-Search around tent area, page 139, 85:  Go to CHOICE #53 (CLEAR)
-Keep moving, page 85:  Go to CHOICE #53 (CLEAR)
 


CHOICE #53, page 85

-Fight cheetah with torch, page 42, 97, 145:  Go to CHOICE #51 (CLEAR)
-Throw water at cheetah, page 15:  Go to CHOICE #53 (CLEAR)
-Go into cave, page 95, 97, 145:  Go to CHOICE #51 (CLEAR)
 


CHOICE #54, page 59

-Constellation jewels, page 24, 142:  Go to CHOICE #19 (CLEAR)
-Left hallway, page 155:  Go to CHOICE #54 (CLEAR)
-Right hallway, page 68:  INCONCLUSIVE ENDING (CLEAR, trapped in room)
-Center hallway, page 149, 142:  Go to CHOICE #19 (CLEAR)

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

El Planeta Más Extraño del Mundo Part 1


It's been a while since I've featured a Spanish Schlock gamebook.  This one is called "The Strangest Planet in the World", which makes no sense.  Its author is Javier Nodras, not a repeat offender like Jaime Blanch Queral.  Although El Planeta Más Extraño del Mundo is a sequel, I chose it because the previous book had barely a paragraph between each CHOICE.


Fortunately, Nodras is generous enough to give a brief introduction for those who haven't played El Expreso Intergaláctico.  Our hero Lorenzo fell victim to asteroids and meteors, and had to deal with "chatty robots" (robots parlanchines) and unfriendly crocodiles.  Eventually, Lorenzo was forced to land after almost running out of fuel.


There isn't much of a mystery concerning the planet's nature when it's called "Tigran Petrosian".  Still, the author tries to keep up some fake suspense:


"You don't know where to get food, because the planet is particularly strange.  The ground is carpeted (tapizar) with gigantic squares (casilla), and a few buildings that seem like black and white towers, and something similar to gigantic pawns (peón), isolated from each other.  You don't see doors or windows on any of these strange buildings".


CHOICE #1 is between "shouting to the four winds" that I'm hungry, ask "Who's talking to me?", or observe my surroundings.  It's hard to resist a Spanish Schlock cliche, so I'll "shout to the four winds".


Maybe the residents are deaf, or the 4 winds don't carry my voice well.  No response at all for a while.  Eventually a voice says "Esteemed traveler, it's a pleasure to be able to satisfy your needs, but before that it would be necessary to know if you are qualified to land on the planet Tigran Petrosian".


CHOICE #2 is to ask what the requirements are to land, to insist that I'm dying of hunger, or to ask why the planet is called Tigran Petrosian in the first place.  Perhaps it's is one of many chess themed worlds, and this one happens to be known for its conservative play style?    


I'm already committed to begging for food.  Lorenzo seems to be the type of person who places gratification of his physical needs before intellectual curiosity.  Surprisingly, this option does not kill me immediately.  Instead, we get a page of text longer than anything up to this point.  My response looks like this:


"I would love to talk with you for a long time about this planet and all its peculiarities, but I don't know if they are arranging a quick way to eat.  I'm not a demanding person.  I'm OK with whatever little thing that may be edible.  I'm not a Sybarite looking for new flavors, only a hungry person who's had a narrow escape from a meteor shower".


The "Sybarite" part isn't a colorful translation on my part.  It actually says "sibarita" in the original text.  That word reminds me strongly of Mary Elizabeth Braddon's sensation novels like Lady Audley's Secret.  Then again, the more classical education of Victorian writers makes their books read like Spanish at times. . .


The mysterious voice suggests that my arrival isn't the usual way that visitors come to Tigran Petrosian.  I'm called by the formal "usted" pronoun, though the voice may be passive-aggressive instead of polite.  "You've commented that you're ready to eat anything edible, if I remember correctly.  And when you say anything, I understand that you want to say anything.  I'll proceed to send you any edible thing, and rescue teams.  It has been a pleasure to talk to you".


A drone drops off a small yellow packet and leaves.  CHOICE #3 is to open the packet or "protest because you wanted food".  I like to think that Lorenzo doesn't take the hint that he's not welcome on this chess planet and decides to eat whatever poison the voice sent for him. . .

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

El Planeta Más Extraño del Mundo Part 2


Lorenzo touches the yellow packet at his feet, "in case it's an explosive or could bite".  Nothing happens.  I duck and see that the packet is wrapped in paper.  CHOICE #4 is to either "let the paper fall to the floor, to quickly find out what's inside the mysterious packet", or keep the paper in my pocket before opening the packet.  You'd think I'd read the outside of the packet first, but this is CYOA logic.  "Suelo" can mean both "ground" and "floor", so it's vague to me.


Let's see what could go wrong if I drop the paper. . .


"You hardly let the envelope paper fall to the ground of the planet when you hear a blaring siren.  You look up, to the sides, and where the yellow packet probably fell, but you don't know what's happening.  You see a ship rapidly flying to you.  It stops 5 meters from where you are, a door opens, and 3 guys (tipo) with unfriendly faces come out of it.  They are uniformed, wear caps, and are armed.  They approach you, and without asking any questions, they handcuff you.


One of them, meanwhile, repeats to you with the tone of one who's done it many times before:


'Anything you say could be used against you.  I inform you that you are arrested from this moment, accused of having contaminated the ground of this planet and not having respected the most elemental norms of recycling.  You will be taken to court so that your case can be analyzed and that they may fix the pertinent punishment'.


Against your will, they take you to the ship, order you to sit, and you see the ship immediately take off.  You understand, a little later, that it isn't good to toss waste onto the ground, but the reaction seems, in any case, a little excessive. 


Maybe this planet should be called something else instead of Tigran Petrosian, and you believe you're going to propose to the the judge that they change its name to something like "Ultrasupermegaclean".  If they saw the beach where you bathed every Sunday, they would flip out when they see the waste.  There was no way to put a towel down without crushing waste.  Your adventure ends here.  END".


Before I add the commentary for this ending, have a few translation notes.  "Flip out" is "flipar", a word taken from English.  "Ultrasupermega" is in the original Spanish, only with "limpio" at the end rather than "clean".  "Waste" is used because the Spanish word is "desperdicios" rather than "basura", the more common word for "trash". The chess planet police call the player by the formal "usted" as well.  (Think "vous" in French.)


This CANONICAL ENDING will have to be Inconclusive.  I have no idea what the punishment for littering is on a chess planet.  It could be anything from having to wear a scarlet letter to death.  If it is execution, does the judge say "checkmate"?


Results So Far


0 Good Endings

0 Deaths

0 Bad Non-Death Endings

0 Neutral Endings

1 Inconclusive Endings





 

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

El Planeta Más Extraño del Mundo Alternate Endings Part 1


After the CANONICAL ENDING featured Lorenzo being hauled off to court for littering, the spambots viewers had to wait for a few days.  Now I finally have the time to show some alternate endings for a gamebook that literally no one else on Goodreads has rated or reviewed.


Let's put the paper wrapper in my pocket instead of dropping it on the floor/ground.  "Inside, there is only a small yellow capsule.  You take it with your fingertips, and have doubts as to what to do with it.  Could it be a medication, a poison, or a complete ultra-concentrated nutrient?"


Well, this is retro science fiction, so the odds are likely that it's a food pill.  CHOICE #5 is to either ask about the yellow capsule or swallow it "because you're dying of hunger".  "Dying of hunger" is not meant to be taken literally in common Spanish, but who knows when it comes to CYOAs?


It might be a horse pill that I'm swallowing, because the text says "while you notice how it crosses, with some difficulty, your throat".  "But afterwards you feel much beter, so you deduce that it was effectively some type of complete protein or vitamin, or a mix of the two".


CHOICE #6 is to set out for the "white tower" close by, or the "building in the shape of a pawn".  As Magneto says in that silly X-Men movie, "in chess, the pawns go first".  Not long after that, I notice more buildings on the chessboard.  There's no option to play Black yet, since both CHOICE #7 buildings are white:  a "horse" or a "king".


Let's pick the piece with the weirdest movement!


"You find yourself in front of a very strange building in the form of a horse's head about 6 meters tall.  You circle around it, looking for some door to enter, but it seems like there's no way to access its interior.  Maybe it's a gigantic sculpture, and the proprietor of this planet is an art lover, who has placed their sculptures on the surfaces with no criteria in particular.


Or perhaps, you propose, that there is some criterion for the position and number of the pieces that occupy the white and black cells.  Unfortunately, you don't have the strength to continue walking.  Not even to continue inventing theories and hypotheses about the motive for these singular gigantic sculptures being on this strange planet.  Without knowing if you're living something real, or if you're having a nightmare, you only know that you feel very tired and hungry.


You sit on the ground, and there you decide to repose for a bit.  But exhaustion wins out, and you surrender to a dream from which you never wake up."


Death with no warning from picking the wrong chess piece.  Are all these Spanish CYOAs apart from La Prisión going to follow the R.A. Montgomery school of writing?


I used "their" instead of "his" to refer to the hypothetical "propietario" because Spanish defaults to grammatical masculine, in case you're curious.  My female Argentine Spanish teacher once thought of that gender as "neutral" rather than "masculine" as English speakers might see it.



Results So Far


0 Good Endings

1 Deaths

0 Bad Non-Death Endings

0 Neutral Endings

1 Inconclusive Endings

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

El Planeta Más Extraño del Mundo Alternate Endings Part 2


Let's pick the king building in CHOICE #7.  A door opens which did not exist before, and a poorly lit seashell staircase leads to a control room.  A glass window and a swivel chair allows 360 degree vision.  A voice from the computer must have been the one from the beginning:  "The game has begun.  From this moment, you all will not have any more communication from the outside on the part of Antakira Software.  We wish you the best of luck.  May the best one win".


Since I'm playing White, my rival says it's my move.  The chessboard is so big that Black is on the opposite side of the planet.  It doesn't take long for the computer to tell me that planet Tigran Petrosian is a dystopia:  "In actual size chess, the prize for the victor is a metal prize and a spaceship to go wherever they may desire.  The loser will be property of the business that has organized this game".


So the sport of Tigran Petrosian is really a slave raid, if a very inefficient one because the corporation only gets one per chess game that takes up the entire planet.  CHOICE #8 is between a "passive strategy", an "aggressive strategy", or to take the coward's way out and dash for my spaceship after leaving the king piece.  The last option probably counts as a forfeit, but I'll do it anyway for comedy value.


"You shake your head, and decide to say that you'll pass up a chance of playing chess if by losing you'll become a slave.  You value your freedom too much to gamble yourself in a little game.  No one responds to you, but you see a ship coming at you at maximum velocity from the horizon.  It lands on the ground when it is 10 meters away from you. 


Three guys leave the ship and they look at you with an expression that says they are not your friends.  They have uniforms and come armed.  One of them lets out a monologue, while the other two immobilize and handcuff you:


'Esteemed gentleman, we inform you that declining a game on planet Tigran Petrosian is considered accepting defeat.  From this moment on you will form a part of the business Antakira Software, proprietor of this planet".


My hunch was correct about running away.  Now if we have 50 other endings that are like that only with minor variations, we'll truly have an R.A. Montgomery book.  According to the short epilogue text, Lorenzo becomes Slave 15,231.  How many people get stranded on Tigran Petrosian anyway if there have been 15,230 previous chess games?  And how could Antakira Software afford 15,230 spaceships to give to the winners?  Is slavery so economical in space that each laborer is worth more than a faster-than-light vessel?



Results So Far


0 Good Endings

1 Deaths

1 Bad Non-Death Endings

0 Neutral Endings

1 Inconclusive Endings

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

El Planeta Más Extraño del Mundo Alternate Endings Part 3


According to a Google search, Antakira Software is the name of a school in Málaga, Spain.  So assume the masterminds of the "spaceships for slaves" scheme work there.


Tigran Petrosian was famous for his defensive play, so let's try playing aggressively and lose to get another ending.  This doesn't happen immediately, as there is still CHOICE #9 when the Black pieces are about to surround my king.  Do I "initiate hostilities", or protect the king?  You know which option I'm going to pick based on the weird Spanish expression!


"Initiating hostilities" actually works.  "You don't waste a single turn on something other than attacking, attacking, and attacking the rival.  While the initiative is yours, you think, your rival can't attack you, because he's preoccupied in defending himself.  Following this logic, you begin to carry out one movement after another.  When your queen attacks one of his rooks, the unit volatizes with an enormous explosion".


The queen is apparently called "lady" in Spanish, and the rook is simply a "tower".  "Volatize" comes from the Spanish verb "volatizar".  Exploding 6 meter tall chess pieces are another massive expense for Antakira Software.


Neither of us are pondering our moves, as both White and Black pieces are disappearing quickly.  Now comes the part where we have to wonder is this is a chess variant rather than the game many Realms Beyonders who are not Herman Gigglethorpe play:


"You have a movement now that permits absolute equality, attacking his queen with your own, in a way that both will perish, and only your king will remain in front of his."  So attacking a piece on planet Tigran Petrosian means that both explode, or is it only if they're the same type?


The rival king comes close enough that I get to see the rival, an old bald man with a white beard.  I offer him a "pact":  "The rules say that one of us will reach riches and a new design of himself, improved, and a ship to escape, while eternal slavery awaits the other.  But our battle has been evenly matched.  Do you really believe it would be just if one of us loses?"




The rival only replies "I listen to your proposal, gentleman" before CHOICE #10.  Before listing the decisions, let's try to make sense of the rules.  Real chess games often end in draws, so how did Antakira Software never think of this possibility before?  And the "new design of himself, improved" is separate from the spaceship in the Spanish text.  Does this mean cyborg or genetic enhancements?


CHOICE #10 has many possibilities: 


1.  "seek the annihilation of both queens",

2.  "wait for happenings and conserve your queen on the planet",

3.  "establish contact with him", "maintain a direct battle with the rival",

4.  "seal peace with a handshake",

5.  "take advantage when he's let down his guard to attack him ferociously"



Wonder what happens when you try to play a deceitful character and pick option 5?


"Now that you've convinced him, and you believe that he's lowered his defenses and is concentrating less, you launch a furious attack against him.  But the response and the agility with which he responds convinces you immediately that it wasn't so.  He continued to expect your movement.  He knew that your words were a thin disguise to hide your intentions of beating him.


It has been a very risky move, so much that a little late you understand that you've lost the battle, and with that your liberty.  Just after checkmate, he says to you some words that you will never forget:


'I would like to say that it has been a clean battle of ideas, but it is not the case.  You have betrayed yourself, and for that you have lost'.


You realize he's right, and while they arrive in a ship to detain you and set off with you to your new destiny, you know that you will never see your uncle again, that the journey you begun will not have the predicted end".


The rival is unusually polite when he gives his checkmate speech and refers to Lorenzo as "usted" despite the player character's young age.  As for the uncle, that's probably a reference to El Expreso Intergaláctico".


Results So Far


0 Good Endings

1 Deaths

2 Bad Non-Death Endings

0 Neutral Endings

1 Inconclusive Endings

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

El Planeta Más Extraño del Mundo Alternate Endings Part 4


"Maintaining a direct battle" in CHOICE #10 also leads to defeat, but a longer and more honorable one.


"The king you control obeys your orders and approaches the king he controls as fast as possible.  A strange dance initiates at this moment on the surface of planet Tigran Petrosian.  When you approach him, he backs up, when it is he who draws near (avecinarse), you are the one who moves away. 


You seem to have created links among yourselves that you always keep united, although the only objective either of you has is to destroy the rival.  However, on the control panel, there isn't the possibility of shooting the king, as it was possible with the rest of the chess pieces that already stopped existing.  There must be another strategy to continue in order to eliminate the rival, but you don't identify it.


You journey across the planet.  However, you now identify that there are illuminated cells whose color is different than before.  They are a pale red color.  Your rival must have itentified them too, because both of you, by intuition, avoid them.  However, while both of your movements continue, you see that other cells begin to change their height, causing small unevenness (desnivel) that make them inaccessible.  Those movement restrictions are ever greater, and when you decide on a move, there are even more inaccessible cells.


At a certain moment, you regret to observe that your rival has left you without any choice:  you can only displace yourself to one of the pale red cells, because the other alternative is occupied by him.  You hardly place yourself on that cell when you listen to the ground sinking half a meter below your piece.  But you guess it's not good news.  You've stayed in a cell without the possibility of displacing yourself in either direction.


Simultaneously, the voice that welcomed you is heard:  'We inform the contenders that the game has been finalized.  The winner is the player who controls the black pieces'.


You see how the black king moves away, and how a spaceship from the distance stops a few meters from where your king remains immobile.  From that ship, three uniformed soldiers descend toward your king, access it, climb to your control room, and detain you.  They inform you that the battle has ended and that from the present moment you will be the property of Antakira Software".


It seems Antakira Software only mentions Lorenzo's slave number in the ending where the player runs away.


Results So Far


0 Good Endings

1 Deaths

3 Bad Non-Death Endings

0 Neutral Endings

1 Inconclusive Endings

[Herman Gigglethorpe]

El Planeta Más Extraño del Mundo Alternate Endings Part 5


"Establish contact" must have belonged to another CHOICE originally, because it leads back to CHOICE #10 in my copy.  At least it isn't La Isla de los Dodos where an entire path is unfinished.  Preserving the queen also leads to defeat:


"You keep the queens on the surface of planet Tigran Petrosian.  You see each other in the distance, never stopping while pointing at each other, avoiding each other by columns and lines.  You must be very careful to avoid double attacks.  Your rival seems to be unaware of the tactics of this kind of positioning, and you observe how he always keeps his queen close to his king, which seems to you an incorrect strategy.  You decide to maintain an opposite strategy, launching attacks with your queen even further from your king.


In one of those attacks, you are surprised by a movement from your rival you didn't expect.  Suddenly, you are attacked simultaneously by the queen and king, and you understand too late that it was not a good idea to separate both at the end of this game.  Your queen volatizes in an explosion, just like your hopes of winning.


A short time later, the rival's king and queen, in a coordinated form, pronounce the fatal word "Checkmate".  You see a ship arrive from the horizon, that lands a few meters away from you.  From it descend 3 uniformed persons, who head toward you king to detain you and communicate to you that you are one more slave of Antakira Software".



Another conclusion that's similar to the previous Bad Non-Death Endings.


Results So Far


0 Good Endings

1 Deaths

4 Bad Non-Death Endings

0 Neutral Endings

1 Inconclusive Endings