[SPOILERS] Fake News and Civ Blues. How BGN Lost and Claimed Victory

[CML]

So who's in the Jeremy Piven tier? gawker.com/5350744/jeremy-pivens-will-repeat-his-mercury-poisoning-story-until-you-think-its-true

[Boldly Going Nowhere]

CML pid='661589' dateline='1517895703']So who's in the Jeremy Piven tier? gawker.com/5350744/jeremy-pivens-will-repeat-his-mercury-poisoning-story-until-you-think-its-true

Jeremy Piven hasn't aged too well in Hollywood. Still, I'll take him as Ari in Entourage every day and twice on Sunday. I loved that character. But it seems he's pretty much full of shit about everything.

I'm going to assume that the Jeremy Piven tier is going to be One-celled life. And that's a bit harsh for the players in this game. However, I liked the Ocean of Tears metaphor well enough to combine it with Old Harry's "Neighbors are food" mantra and the Oceanic Food Chain picture conveniently does both while allowing me to divide our 25 players into five neat, even classifications. So we'll have five of our players quite unjustly labelled as microorganisms. Sorry fellas. Nothing personal. 

I'm not giving my list after one worker comment. More chum needed!

[JR4]

I'm finally ready to start making some opposition analysis, but only if I can get a little lurker participation. I know there aren't many lurkers with so many playing in the game, but here's a little chum for you guys: it comes with a tier list.

Oh, a tier list!? Yes, please.

[Cornflakes]

I'm finally ready to start making some opposition analysis, but only if I can get a little lurker participation. I know there aren't many lurkers with so many playing in the game, but here's a little chum for you guys: it comes with a tier list.



Who's willing to take the bait?

Did the person who made this try reading it the next day? Why does the text read top-to-bottom while the graphic read bottom-to-top 

[Boldly Going Nowhere]

Yeah. Like this thread, that graphic is not top-notch. It's as backwards as a QB trying to catch a pass...



I don't know why this amuses me so much. 

[CML]

Mr Piven given his Icelandic-heavy consumption of charismatic megafish is a pentanary consumer. Consider my interest thoroughly ginned up

[DaveV]

I'm finally ready to start making some opposition analysis, but only if I can get a little lurker participation. I know there aren't many lurkers with so many playing in the game, but here's a little chum for you guys: it comes with a tier list.



Who's willing to take the bait?

Why are the illustrations exactly backward from the text?

[Krill]

I think the picture is perfect.

[Boldly Going Nowhere]

It really doesn't seem very well executed. It will fit in nicely with my game. Kudos to whoever made it, didn't proof it, and put it up for Google to find. :cheers:

[Boldly Going Nowhere]

I suppose I did promise some pregame opposition analysis. And a tier list. So I'll just roll out them out together, in order. This should take a while, hopefully lasting until the game starts. Gaspar, if you're still around, feel free to chime in.

I'll start with myself since I'm not realistically going to say how many players I think are better than me. They'll just have to beat me. (Many will).

Boudica (The Weekend - Can't Feel My Face, AGG/CHM) of Khmer (Blue Civ, Hunting/Mining)

I know she'll be the death of me... She'll always get the best of me, and the worst is yet to come... This I know.

This is going to go...poorly. And I love it. Lots of unit promos sounds like the most fun thing there is in the world of civ. And it is. But there's always a downside to that out of this world, out of body shithouse drunk experience when you can't feel your face and nothing could be better. For Boudica, it's all about the units. Nothing else even matters.

I can't feel my face when I'm with you. But I love it.

Don't even worry about sucking at expansion or your enemies having more build queues than you. It's a given. You are SPARTA (Khmer, actually) so your handful of promo-happy hoplites (Ballistaphants? Whatever.) will just have to hold the pass against the hordes to come. With a smile. Because you're probably going to be outnumbered when they come.


But don't worry about that. Set the world on fire and have yourself a good time.



Player analysis: Boldly Going Nowhere

The civ combo is the boring part. You want the player analysis. Fine. I'm decently good at civ but I'm not at the top end of this field. When I'm motivated you should expect tight micro, good expansion (even with shitty expansion traits I'll be fine), and a strong economy. If left alone and allowed to pick my fights I'm capable of doing some damage. But I've been solidly beaten by better players too. I expect that to happen again here but I'm not playing with the final showdown in mind. I want to rumble early and often, and I don't expect this to be happening within my borders.

Weakness: A tendency towards passivity. Boudica should help here. I like to builder. I tend to overestimate what's happening in the fog and bemoan my inability to take action against a distant rival. Shouldn't matter. Take care of business in the neighborhood and run my own race but don't be afraid to burninate all of the population into a ravaging hoard of units if an opportunity looks promising. I am usually reluctant to lay waste to my beautiful economy in pursuit of a sprint to units unto conquest. We'll see if I do a better job of optimizing sprint production for earlier conquest.

Civ:   (blue, average)
Leader: (bash, average)
Player: (self-satisfied and chasing the luls, not bad if I do say so myself)
Chance of winning:  
Top 10 finish:  
Don't Say I Didn't Warn You: : - Someone is going to unexpectedly be on the wrong end of the pointy spear in this game. We'll see if it's me.

Conclusion: Tertiary Consumer (Small Sharks and Tuna Fish)

Could be worse.

 

Up Next: The Reel Big Fish...