As a French person I feel like it's my duty to explain strikes to you. - AdrienIer

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Nothing like the Prodigal Sons: The Odd Couple actually play as themselves.

Bantams wins lawyer of the game award: never to be believed.
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What are we up to, T91?
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Who knows. Gaspar will write a report in the next day or two I think.
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(February 5th, 2014, 11:03)Boldly Going Nowhere Wrote: What are we up to, T91?

(February 5th, 2014, 11:05)NobleHelium Wrote: Who knows. Gaspar will write a report in the next day or two I think.

Sorry - Gavagai teching Math and HBR in like 4t depressed me too much to report lately. I'll get back to it soon.
I've got some dirt on my shoulder, can you brush it off for me?
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How exciting!

Played: Pitboss 18 - Kublai Khan of Germany Somalia | Pitboss 11 - De Gaulle of Byzantium | Pitboss 8 - Churchill of Portugal | PB7 - Mao of Native America | PBEM29 Greens - Mao of Babylon
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No worries. That is report enough for me. alright
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t92 - Eff everything

So we had a fairly eventful turn that I thought I should report. Unfortunately, I'm too annoyed to actually report so what I will instead give you is an overview shot and a few select highlights from my chat with Noble where we played the turn. I'll then follow that up with a quick TL;DR of the current situation.




Chat spoilered for length and foul language:

Quote: Gaspar: i took care of a couple of obvious things - whipped plame, finished the eastern mines
gavagai is roading that plains cottage tile
was debating whether we should threaten the worker again but unfortunately we can'
t get the spear there this turn to do so
k im in
NobleHelium: uhm
why would you not move the spear back towards plame
if we are not covering the worker
Gaspar: im an idiot
NobleHelium: i thought that was obvious
Gaspar: it was
i intended to
then somehow forgot
NobleHelium: all right
NobleHelium: attack sakae with axe?
Gaspar: regardless, going to move that spear back to the sheep now before i forget again
NobleHelium: k
Gaspar: ok, attacking
flawless
NobleHelium: odds with the chariot?
Gaspar: chariot gets 79.8% odds w/o promo
NobleHelium: is the warrior full fortify
Gaspar: yes
NobleHelium: well
we do hit a breakpoint by promoting to c1, on the other hand if we win without then we can pick up sentry
Gaspar: i think id gamble
NobleHelium: well
the thing is
we can also pick up 2 exp by killing the barb axe on flat land
and the odds are like 95% there
Gaspar: thats true
NobleHelium: let's promote to c1 and plan for this chariot to be shock
or c2, depending
Gaspar: yeah
NobleHelium: and the other guy can be sentry
Gaspar: alright
90.4, attacking
NobleHelium: k
Gaspar: won
26g
NobleHelium: nice
3 turns revolt?
Gaspar: 84/100
3t, yeah
<SNIP>
NobleHelium: whiskey chariot to the horse?
Gaspar: explore first?
NobleHelium: yeah
was about to say that
Gaspar: NW
NobleHelium: yes 1NW
zoom out for culture check if necessary
Gaspar: either mike or 2metra
NobleHelium: or goreripper?
Gaspar: the purples are too close under fog to tell
no
not goreripper
NobleHelium: let me see
i hope it's not mike
because that does mean bantams is probably in the other corner lol
Gaspar: https://dl.dropboxusercontent.com/u/1832...B16/03.jpg
NobleHelium: MAYBE GAVAGAI IS TECHING HBR BECAUSE HE THINKS HE CAN CONQUER US AND BANTAMS AT THE SAME TIME
Gaspar: lol
NobleHelium: that's 2m
Gaspar: well
lets get the contact either way
NobleHelium: well let's see
he is sumeria
Gaspar: interesting
4 religions founded
3 on our continent
NobleHelium: go SW and offer OB? or what
Gaspar: yeah
that was my thought
NobleHelium: ok
Gaspar: fail
fuck me
NobleHelium: you misclicked again huh
Gaspar: goddamit
motherfucker
its mike
NobleHelium: you didn't land next to a barb did you
oh
Gaspar: and he has 2 workers right on the border
that we could have sniped np
fuck
NobleHelium: you mean we could have guessed that he had two borders on the border
and stopped short this turn to move in next turn
Gaspar: no
i mean if i had known it was mike
i probably would have gone for surprise
which means maybe we get the workers
but at least half those fucks
were because its mike
maybe 3/4
NobleHelium: well we can still offer OB as a sign of peace and then take the workers
Gaspar: good call
hes on 9 cities
NobleHelium: LOL
is that more than gavagai
Gaspar: yep
NobleHelium: check victory conditions
does he have more pop than gav
Gaspar: no
gav more pop, mike more land area
NobleHelium: what leader is mike
Gaspar: liz
i mean really
fuck
NobleHelium: lol
Gaspar: eh whatever
NobleHelium: i don't really know that we really care about 2 workers at this point
to kill the trade routes
Gaspar: i guess
NobleHelium: now we don't get trade routes until we get sailing
Gaspar: nonetheless
NobleHelium: but that's still pretty soon
Gaspar: offered OB
he and gav have no deals
NobleHelium: any history of wars?
Gaspar: no previous wardecs
adjusting to keep all ep on gav
NobleHelium: yeah
Gaspar: mikes graphs are only interesting in a voyeur sense
so fucking awful bantams is the 4th player on our continent
fuck this game so hard
Gaspar: alright anyway
whiskey chariot to the horse?
mikes cap is 2nd best city in the world, size 8 as well
NobleHelium: yes
Gaspar: and he didnt build henge
NobleHelium: ok
anything else about mike so we can stop talking about him
Gaspar: nope
NobleHelium: because bantams being the other guy is just fucking stupid
Gaspar: jsut checked those two because i thought you might ask
NobleHelium: k
Gaspar: but yeah
NobleHelium: well normally i would
Gaspar: any more about that and im gonna rage and i want to finish this turn
<SNIP>
NobleHelium: sorry i mixed up 2m and mike btw
i was confident about it
Gaspar: no worries
it looked more sumerian than french to me as well
but those two are so close than when you're just fog-gazing its easy to mix up
since the border is always darker
<SNIP>
NobleHelium: well
i was kinda thinking maybe we should just build the colossus
Gaspar: well
we dont have a convenient way to get those forests chopped at the moment?
NobleHelium: i don't think it matters
we can easily put the chops into whatever we'd otherwise be building now
Gaspar: UNLESS WE SNIPE MIKES WORKERS
alright
colossus it is
NobleHelium: if by snipe you mean walk up and clamp handcuffs on them
Gaspar: lol
iran
i put us on the new mine over the lake
we grow/whip next turn
NobleHelium: yeah i see that
Gaspar: so its debatable
NobleHelium: mine is good
Gaspar: alright
thats everything
I suppose enough stuff happened that I should report this turn, eh?
NobleHelium: report =
RAGE RAGE RAGERAGREGRGEAGRE
Gaspar: its just so obnoxious
there are three competent players in this game
and we're in between 2 of them
and the third eliminated his neighbor 45t ago
NobleHelium: you mean opponents
i'm not sure mikehendi is competent yet but he is doing pretty well judging by appearances
Gaspar: im not quite willing to give us competent at the moment
NobleHelium: well if we weren't competent then we wouldn't have a right to rage
so take that into consideration
Gaspar: MAYBE WE'RE JUST BANTAMS, VETERAN EDITION
<SNIP, TURN ROLLS>
heh
another barb city
NobleHelium: where?
i was hoping one would spawn in the southeast
Gaspar: 6W of hc
pretty sure we just raze that one
NobleHelium: on the plains?
Gaspar: yeah
NobleHelium: well
it works ok with the dotmap but it's not a strong city either
Gaspar: it gets wet rice and absolutely no production
mike logged in
NobleHelium: yeah if we capture it we would just be trading maintenance for whipping out some HAs
Gaspar: dont think hes taking the OB
yeah he didnt take it
workers moved
no ob
NobleHelium: whatev
Gaspar: we could just go apeshit
NobleHelium: we could follow the lake norht
and then try to get OB with bantams
Gaspar: and go pillage his rice
lol
BANTAMS BE OUR FRIEND WE'RE TERRIBLE JUST LIKE YOU
NobleHelium: yeah the other possibility is to hang around mikehendi
and look for an open city to raze
wouldn't be surprised if there is one
Gaspar: yeah
in fairness
he sees us in 2nd place on the scoreboard
and probably doesn't realize its the emptiest 2nd place ever
NobleHelium: well
emptiest second place ever is thearchduke after building henge, oracle and founding two religions with sury
Gaspar: lol

TL;DR:
  • We captured a barb city this turn
  • We finished HBR this turn
  • We're maybe think about sort of half-assedly building Colossus
  • We met Mikehendi, who is our Western neighbor this turn after first thinking it was 2metraninja
  • Mike being our Western neighbor means Bantams is Gavagai's Western neighbor
  • Mikehendi seems to be doing pretty well
  • Bantams seems to be doing awful
  • Eff this game
I've got some dirt on my shoulder, can you brush it off for me?
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Quote:Gaspar: MAYBE WE'RE JUST BANTAMS, VETERAN EDITION

Do you have what it takes though? Like are you willing to fake insinuate a medical emergency to delay the turn clock?
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Only Hashoosh can delay the turn clock, apparently.
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I DONT KNOW WHAT IS FUCKING GOING ON
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