A Very Perpy SG

[NobleHelium]

I think you missed the memo Dave...

[Ellimist]

I think you missed the memo Dave...

Probably because it was in spoiler tags.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2mRsVMbdqE0

[NobleHelium]

That was just a facsimile of the memo.

[Selrahc]

Here is my first impressions and stuff from before I play the save.

We're in a battle with Auric. It's a horrific confusing mess, we don't have an assembled army and forces are running around through the borders essentially at random. Hell terrain is spreading through our kingdom and will probably burn up our flood plains before I can stop it, for some reason we've researched Order despite being in AV. Possibly as a response to Hell terrain? It's not getting a conversion from me. We're still Arcane/Charismatic/Raiders and not building or getting Adepts.

On the plus side, we've basically finished settling our chunk of land. We're in a long golden age. We have a massive technology edge over Auric, with Mimics and Ritualists to fight his army of Javelin Men. And if I had more than Freaks and Adepts in place, that might be handy.

So the plan is this. I spend this turn set building and assembling an army of mimics and ritualists, upgrading the most promising of the freaks. I also set technology research full pace for Malevolent Designs, and start work on the Infernal Grimoire. The person who inherits the next turn set should gain access to Eidolons, Beasts of Agares and Immortals. Assuming they follow through on my plans, which should hopefully be apparent. They should also have a moderately big and superior army standing next to Illian lands ready for a quick slash and burn.

The biggest action in the turnset is probably going to be my attempt to get units ready for an immortal upgrade. The most promising freaks will be upgraded to Mimics, then sent into battle for XP. We're charismatic so it should be possible to get a few well on the way to immortality with luck.

Also, somebody has named a town My Little Hippo. I appreciate that.

The actual report is likely to be a lot less cogent than this. But this is the plan I'll be trying to follow. Tune in tomorrow to see the results.

[Selrahc]

He could feel them. Surrounding him, clamouring and pounding. A million points of light. Drowning him in their thoughts and actions. Selfish. They were all so selfish, broadcasting their emotions and desires and petty feelings everywhere. He had to see them all. But he had emerged. It was him. He was the one asking the questions. The one at the heart of the ocean of light, making it dance. With perfect inner balance, he could control it. He could hold everybody within himself and still be him. He was him. He was himself. He was... Who was? Who?

There was a knock on the door. Inside the man's mind, an orchestra of consciousness collapsed in on itself. Perpentach was lost again.

And a little rogue thought form pushed its way to pre-eminence. It knew who it was, and what it was supposed to be doing. This was a war! And he was here to fight it!
There was just one catch. But it was a big one.

Anybody crazy enough to fight this war was too crazy to be allowed to fight.


Colonel Cathcart was full of purpose. He knew exactly what he had to do. He had to organize the bombing and destruction of the [strike]Itillians[/strike] [strike]Italians[/strike] Illians. He was part of the best god damn empire in the world, no matter what those crazy red [strike]Communists[/strike] Calabim said. He was part of an empire that fought for truth justice and free enterprise.


But he had a problem. Colonel Cassiel. That rat bastard was forcing his men to fight more combat missions than any other army in the world. And he always managed to get his bombing patterns tightly packed together to make a neat aerial photograph.

There was only one thing to do in response to that. Colonel Cathcart would have to organize the greatest military offensive action that the War had yet seen, to prove to the Generals at group that Cathcart was just the kind of rough and ready go getter who would be perfect to be bolstered to General rank.

So Cassiel had raised levees. Drafted Mimics. Brought in freaks and fighters to fill the ranks and launch more combat missions than any other commander.

But now Cathcart had found another problem. A man called Yossarian.

The man had been raising problems by refusing to fight more missions, and saying that the rest of the army didn't need to fight more missions either. He was saying that he was going to live forever, or die trying.
[SPOILER]"From now on I'm thinking only of me."

Major Danby replied indulgently with a superior smile: "But, Yossarian, suppose everyone felt that way."

"Then," said Yossarian, "I'd certainly be a damned fool to feel any other way, wouldn't I?"

What kind of talk was that? It was unpatriotic. Men had to die for their country. Cathcart quietly assigned him to a few of the more dangerous mission assignments.

But the man refused to die! This was worse than unpatriotic, it was downright uncooperative. Cathcart had a feeling this could be a real black eye for him at Group Headquarters.
Inside the head of Perpentach grouped voices suddenly clamoured. Cathcart shook them off.


In all other respects, the war was going fantastically well. He had subcontracted the defence of Freakwater out to Milo Minderbinder.

This time Milo had gone too far. Bombing his own men and planes was more than even the most phlegmatic observer could stomach, and it looked like the end for him. … Milo was all washed up until he opened his books to the public and disclosed the tremendous profit he had made.

A fine up and coming young gentleman from a good family. And while technically Milo had sold out the defences and lost the city, it was all fine because he had arranged to have it taken back again quickly and made a tidy profit on the deal. So that was fine. It was all fine.


And his plan of operations to give a real black eye to Colonel Cassiel by employing the Nightwatch had turned up trumps.

And his Ritualist Force had produced some of the neatest bombing patterns he'd ever seen, which just so happened to catch some of the rat bastards forces in their (incredibly neat) blast radius.



There was a slight snag when he ended up at war with both Heaven and Hell.

He couldn't decide whether it was a black eye(due to the needless conflict) or a feather in his cap(due to the chance at glory). In the end he had blamed the entire affair on Major Major and returned to worrying about Yossarian.

As he ruminated the issue, he received word of the capture of Pianosa. Apparently Yossarian had been injured in the capture, and was in hospital there. Perfect! Cathcart jumped up. He had the perfect solution! Perhaps everybody could live forever after all...


And the room swam out of focus. The lights started to play again... Cathcart had left the Balseraphs in charge of an incredibly elite military force, and positioned it for further conflict. What personality would emerge next to direct Perpentach?

OOC Summary: I couldn't be bothered waiting around, so I threw away some teching power in order to mount attacks earlier, and build up an experienced force of mimics. Honestly, I love Mimics. They are some of the most entertaining units in the game, and Dantski has the core of a powerful force building up. He already has some decent candidates for Immortality and Eidolon status, although I'd hold off on promotions for now until they can Mimic themselves even more fun things. Auric is annoying because half the time mimics steal a mostly useless Winterborn promo, but the Horselords should be much more interesting. Stealing Horselord promos is entirely possible, and can create an incredibly fast moving army.
On the other hand, I made a *lot* of enemies. Hyborem, Rhoanna/Basium and the Remnants of Auric are all out for blood. Cassiel has large armies wandering through our territory.
One thing that happened, but I didn't report was the capture of Orthus's axe. A small force of Hippus Horsemen tried to slip through Aurics territory, past our battle host. We doubled back and pulled them to pieces. With the Axe being the grand prize, although stealing promotions from the elite Hippus forces was handy too.
Draft Mimics, Draft Freaks, Upgrade good Freaks. That was the pattern I fell into. We now have a reasonable military in raw size, as well as it being qualitatively excellent. We're pretty safe to win from here, even against runaway Alexis.
[/SPOILER]

[Dantski]

Looking at the game first thoughts are… WTF is going on?

Really have absolutely no clue where to start, we’re at war with 4 civs, half our land is hell terrain, we have a big stack to attack an Illian city protected by 4 units but a smaller one sieging (sp?) Dis. Cassiel is also by Dis which is probably stopping us Ritualisting the defenders to cinders.

Economy wise we’re afloat but the golden age is making the situation look better than it is.

Foreign news…apparently we’re good friends with Cassiel, but the people not at war with us are cautious and likely to dogpile.

Techs? Well seems like the thinking was to get to Malevolent Designs and maybe just shut down research after that, I don’t know if we can take down Alexis later but whatever.

Anyway first action is to pop a dungeon (because dungeons are fun!), wait exploring a lair takes 3 turns? Blargh!

Anyway I take the nearest Illian city Garduk, keeping it.

Rhoanna brings a pathetic stack of Horsemen next to me. I kill all but one of them taking a lot of Horselord promotions for Mimics.

I trade with Cassiel, he gives Necromancy for Military strategy + gold. Also he wants our Iron and is willing to give Marble and some gold per turn. Seems fair.

First horseman appears T197, no idea where and the map didn’t show like it does with Orthus.

Make peace with Auric, so we can concentrate units on eliminating Hyborem ASAP. He throws in 160 gold, the city of Lakis and 3 cheapish techs (Alteration + Animal Handling + Optics).

Cassiel declares war on Alexis + Tebryn… suicidal much?

Complete infernal grimoire. So many fun choices (Righteousness and Way of the Earthmother possibly the best 2!) but I pick Sorcery because dem level 2 spells OP.

Hyborem is moving slowly towards our junk burning sand city, don’t care about defending it if I get to take Dis in exchange.

On Turn 201 Dis is captured after losing a couple of Mimics in unlucky combat rolls. Hyborem was unavailable for comment, a note from his mother apologized for his absence but he was busy playing in the sand.

Turn 204 features Cassiel losing a city to the Sheaim.

And on the handover turn I finish Malevolent Designs, the rest of the team can play around with Beats of Agares and Mardero if they so desire.

Sorry for no pics, the save took several hours to play and dragged on.

[pindicator]

Sorry for the delay, I've been trying to sort things out. But I'm on it now.

Our lands are on fire. Wtf do I do?*




[SIZE="1"]*Don't actually tell me, it'll be funnier if I don't know.[/SIZE]

[Bobchillingworth]

Got a save to attach?



(Not sure if your spoiler is your report or something else)

[pindicator]

Something else

[NobleHelium]

pindicator:

If you don't know how to fix your lands, then the best course of action would be...