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Yawn. filler post.
# "Baldric, go forth into the streets and announce that Lord Blackadder wishes to sell his house. Percy, just go forth into the streets."
- EB, "Money", BA2
# "So you don't know the way to France either - bugger."
- EB, "Potato", BA2, to Captain Redbeard Rum
# "My Lord, I have a cunning plan."
- Baldric, several times, BA3 / BA4
# "I think I'll write my tombstone - Here lies Edmund Blackadder, and he's bloody annoyed."
- EB, BA4
# G: "If we do happen to step on a mine, Sir, what do we do ?"
EB: "Normal procedure, Lieutenant, is to jump 200 feet in the air and scatter oneself over a wide area."
- somewhere in No Man's Land, BA4
# EB: "You don't look like Charlie Chaplin, Baldric. You don't have a moustache."
B: "No, Sir. But I have this - a dead slug."
- BA4
# EB: "What is your name, boy ?"
Boy: "Kate."
EB: "Kate, that's an unusual name for a boy."
Boy: "It's short for ... Bob."
- Kate, trying to pass as a boy, BA2
# "Don't worry, you'll get over her. I did, and so did Baldric."
- EB to Percy, when he discovers a new love, BA2
# "I think the phrase rhymes with Clucking Bell!"
- EB, after finding out he's going 'over the top', BA4
# "I made a note in my diary on the way over here. It simply reads - bugger."
- Capt Darling, after being sent to the trench to go over the top, BA4.
# LF: "You should treat your aircraft like you treat your woman."
BA: "So you should take your plane out to dinner and a movie?"
LF: "No, get in her 5 times a day and take her to heaven and back!"
- LF, teaching the 20 minuters, BA4
# "That would be as hard as finding a piece of hay in an incredibly large stack of needles."
- EB
# G: "What is your name?"
EB: "Wibble."
G: "What is 2 plus 2?"
EB: "Wibble, Wibble."
- EB, trying to prove he is mad, in his bunker, with underpants on his head and a pendil up each nostril, BA4
# "I'm as excited as a terribly excited person who has a really good reason for being terribly excited."
- G, after being asked by Gen. Melchett how he feels about going over the top, BA4.
# B: "I want my mother."
EB: "Ah, yes. A maternally crazed gorilla would come in handy at this very moment."
- BA4
# "Have you ever visited Planet Earth ?"
- EB to the General, BA4.
# "You've taken a vow of silence, how fascinating. Tell me about it."
- Lord Percy, to EB's religios Uncle Whiteadder, Beer, BA2
# "I'm going to a fancy dress party as Lady Hamilton's pussy."
- EB to the Price Regent, wearing a catskin cloak he bought when he thought he was going to be knighted.
# "Baldric, that is the worst plan since Abe Lincoln said to his wife, I'm sick of sitting around the house, let's catch a show"
- EB, BA4
# "This will be the greatest moment in art since Mona Lisa walked into the studio and said, I'm feeling a little odd today."
- EB to G and B, about to do his painting, BA4
# "Nursie, am I glad to see you or did someone put a canoe in my pocket."
- LF to Nursie, Bells, BA2
# EB: "With 100,000 men dying every day, who's going to miss one small pigeon?"
BANG!
G: "Well, obviously not you, sir"
- BA4
# Bob: "I wanted to see a war run so badly."
EB: "Well you've come to the right place, then. There hasn't been a war run this badly since Olaf the hairy, King of all the vikings, ordered 80,000 battle helmets with the horns on the inside."
- EB, BA4
# "We're in a sticky situation all right. This is the stickiest situation since Sticky the Stick insect got caught on a sticky bun."
- EB, BA4
# "Baldric, you have the intellectual capacity of a dirty potato."
- EB
# "Since then, we've made as much ground as an asthmatic ant with a heavy load of shopping."
- EB commenting on Allied progress in WWI, BA4
# "Must it end this way, Baldric? Am I to cut you into thin strips and tell the Prince that you walked on an extremely sharp grid wearing a heavy hat?"
- EB to Baldric, BA3
# "Bloody potatoes. Next thing you know, they'll be eating them."
- EB to B, Potato, BA2
# "Believe me,Baldric, an eternity in the company of Beelzebub and all his hellish minions will be as nothing compared to five minutes alone with me...and this pencil."
- EB to B, BA3
# "Like private parts to the Gods are we, they play with us for their sport."
- Lord Melchett to EB, Chains, BA2
# "Oh, it was a scythe!"
- EB, after playing charades with his guard, Chains, BA2
# "She's got a tongue like an electric eel and she likes the taste of a man's tonsils."
- LF, to camera, about Kate (Bob), Bells, BA2
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